9 Traits to cultivate a fruitful marriage: Peace

[00:00:02] Well hello again and welcome back to the Trim The Wick podcast. Hi Becky how you doing?

[00:00:07] Hey Dan I'm good. So we are with you again for another amazing week of the Trim The Wick podcast

[00:00:15] And um, crazy week we've had a lot going on. We have what went on?

[00:00:22] Well it just seems like it's been so much I don't remember specifics.

[00:00:28] Well we've had quite a bit going on this week.

[00:00:31] I had to deal with some stressors so it was probably a week like everybody else.

[00:00:37] We had life this week. Yeah life happened. That's right.

[00:00:41] That's right.

[00:00:42] You know those weeks were like you just you just wake up and things have to be done.

[00:00:48] And so this is the this is the time that we get to you know our faith is tested and we are encouraged.

[00:00:56] And it's a it's a time where we get to trust and rely on God.

[00:01:01] It's you know it's good to have those times where you can't just rely on yourself,

[00:01:06] where you can't just think that I can do this my own power.

[00:01:10] Right keeps you in touch.

[00:01:12] Yeah it does and it keeps you focused you know on the important things.

[00:01:16] Yeah.

[00:01:17] And I think it helps you hone that discipline of looking for the good things because in all of the life that we had it.

[00:01:25] It wasn't just the stressors. We had some really good things too.

[00:01:28] We had some great visits with friends.

[00:01:30] Yeah.

[00:01:31] We got to celebrate some cool milestones with some of our kids.

[00:01:35] It is interesting when you look back at stuff when you look back at you know any time you go back and look back at a week or a day or a year.

[00:01:44] It always seems like the things that float to the top are the negative things.

[00:01:50] You know are the hard struggles and are the things that bleed to lead.

[00:01:56] Yeah.

[00:01:57] Yeah.

[00:01:58] And that's true.

[00:01:59] I mean that is a human nature thing.

[00:02:02] So you've got to keep reminding yourself of the good stuff.

[00:02:06] Right.

[00:02:07] You know, and I think that's one of the the keys when you're walking to Christian life is that Satan is going around.

[00:02:14] He's trying to kill us.

[00:02:16] He's trying to destroy us. He's trying to defeat us in every way.

[00:02:20] Right.

[00:02:21] Yes.

[00:02:22] And all ready to feed it so.

[00:02:23] Yeah.

[00:02:24] And sometimes we get bogged down in those things.

[00:02:27] Those are things that bogged down.

[00:02:29] We lose the victories and we lose sight of, well this was something that I overcame or this was something that God carried me through or this is something that you know looked horrible but ended up being a blessing in the long right.

[00:02:43] And these are the people that he provided to walk with me through this and these are that there's there's a verse of Philippians. You already know this.

[00:02:51] One of my favorite favorite passages is Philippians four versus four through eight and I cling to verse eight regularly. I call it the What So Everythings.

[00:03:00] In fact, I recently wrote an article on this if I find myself stuck.

[00:03:04] I start pulling up those What So Everythings. What So Everythings Are True and What So Everythings Are Just and What So Everythings Are Right and What So Everythings Are Right and What So Everythings Are Right.

[00:03:12] Where the of praise, you know and it's that discipline of really turning your mind.

[00:03:19] We need to go back to those things and pull those things up and put them in front of us.

[00:03:25] We do because like I said the enemy is in front of our faces every day. He's trying to defeat us. He's trying to trip us up trying to knock us off our game so that we become less effective in the kingdom.

[00:03:38] Right and it's not like he can ultimately defeat us. He's already defeated, but if he can keep us away from our purpose and steal our peace right because that passage of scripture talks about the piece of Christ.

[00:03:53] Yes, you know strengthening us and resting in our hearts and yeah.

[00:03:59] We want to continue this week, continuing on our nine traits to cultivate a fruitful marriage.

[00:04:07] You know this week we wanted to focus on the next one which is peace. The first two or love and joy.

[00:04:15] And joy. But to me love joy and peace go hand in hand.

[00:04:19] Yes.

[00:04:20] You know this thing of peace. We think of peace as in the house is quiet or you know the kids finally leave us alone for the environment is still the external and a lot of times that's what we think pieces.

[00:04:34] Right.

[00:04:35] Is that it's finally at a point where I can breathe right or I can close my eyes and not hear something breaking or pulling at me.

[00:04:47] So we equate peace with our comfort level for me.

[00:04:51] Correct.

[00:04:52] That's not really the definition of peace.

[00:04:54] No.

[00:04:55] That's not what God is talking about here when he says love joy, peace is one of the fruit that you'll have because that word peace does not mean the absence of things around you that are pulling at you or loud or causing stress

[00:05:16] that the word peace here and the Greek is a cooperation that it is to that are working together in harmony.

[00:05:24] What's interesting, it's not always talking about working together as in its exact but it's in harmony.

[00:05:32] So like if you put it into musical terms, it's an instrument or a pair of group of instruments playing different notes but the same tune.

[00:05:43] And they work together to actually accomplish a greater beauty.

[00:05:48] Yeah and this is where I think the husband of wife and God working together to be a harmony or a chord.

[00:05:56] Right.

[00:05:57] Oh, wow.

[00:05:58] Threefold chord.

[00:05:59] You know, but it's a harmony and the thing is in a harmony you're not playing the same note like you just said.

[00:06:07] Because a note though that the note you're playing and the note I'm playing is complementary to each other.

[00:06:14] That the two notes actually build upon each other and hold each other up.

[00:06:21] So your note is a good note right.

[00:06:23] And it's clear and it's beautiful and it's consistent and but when you add my note to it, it's a thing of greater beauty and if we're both structured around the notes that God is playing.

[00:06:36] Right.

[00:06:37] It forms this cohesive thing and that's what we're seeing here is in this is piece and a marriage that it's the husband and wife who are playing their own notes, right.

[00:06:49] But they are playing them together that build each other up that complement each other and they ultimately make it sound better.

[00:06:57] Right.

[00:06:58] And they work together to support the whole piece of music.

[00:07:01] You know, I think about this.

[00:07:02] I think about growing up you and I had two very different experiences growing up.

[00:07:07] Yeah.

[00:07:08] I can remember going over to your house and you had like a 19 inch television.

[00:07:13] Right.

[00:07:14] That was not the primary source of entertainment in my home.

[00:07:17] No.

[00:07:18] And you can you know tell the story of when the first time for New Year's time came over to my house.

[00:07:24] So we were we had just been dating for a short time.

[00:07:29] It was New Year's day and you and your dad had built a satellite dish in the backyard.

[00:07:34] And y'all this was satellite dishes were new technology at the time.

[00:07:39] And we were the first one on the block that had a satellite dish.

[00:07:42] It was it was you.

[00:07:43] It was a 12 foot diameter monster.

[00:07:46] You're back.

[00:07:47] Yeah.

[00:07:48] But you guys had worked on it and you had worked on it to a purpose because you and your dad love watching sports.

[00:07:57] And you had what was it for?

[00:08:00] Yeah.

[00:08:01] Was it four or five TV's we had four televisions on and we had different bull games on from all over the country

[00:08:09] All on at the same time and then of course on the big TV was the Rose Bowl.

[00:08:14] Right.

[00:08:15] So we could watch Michigan.

[00:08:16] So I'm walking to the house and I'm used to it.

[00:08:18] You know, in 19 inch TV that we watched, you know, we watched it but it wasn't.

[00:08:23] It wasn't on all the time in our house.

[00:08:25] We did a lot of other things and I walked into this New Year's day extra.

[00:08:30] Again, you're done and it is I didn't know what to do with all of this information.

[00:08:38] Yep.

[00:08:39] And we had a great time.

[00:08:40] We we loved watching our sports and you know, my dad and I I think the nineteen eighty four Detroit Tigers.

[00:08:48] They made a run and won the World Series.

[00:08:52] I think I saw every game except for like five or six of them because with our satellite niche we were able to see every game.

[00:08:59] So but yeah, but I bring all that up to go our entertainment and what we did around the house and even how our house operated and how they focused on entertainment was vastly different.

[00:09:14] Right.

[00:09:15] So now you have these two people who were brought up in a very different way of a home.

[00:09:22] I mean, we're not even talking about discipline or food or I mean, we're just talking about entertainment here.

[00:09:28] Right.

[00:09:29] But it was vastly different and and so when we now are moving into our new home, we're now married couple.

[00:09:38] So we have an issue because I want the biggest TV and I want to put it in the middle of the living room and put everything around.

[00:09:47] And you wanted one in the bedroom too.

[00:09:49] Yep.

[00:09:50] And this was because this was what in my mind as a family, this is how you come together for entertainment and for just pleasure time of watching sports or watching entertainment.

[00:10:04] Right.

[00:10:05] That's that's what you shared.

[00:10:07] Right. So now you have a husband and a wife, you had very different you guys were I would have been content without a television house.

[00:10:16] It gives me a wall of books and we'll read out loud together and we'll go for walks and we'll listen to music.

[00:10:24] We were together on the listening to music.

[00:10:26] Yeah, listen music that was good.

[00:10:29] But I mean, we had to come together and sit down and go okay because for you it was one thing for me was another thing but we had to support each other.

[00:10:43] Right.

[00:10:44] And we had to work it out.

[00:10:45] Yep.

[00:10:46] Well because on the television thing it was actually a thing where we were almost diametrically opposed.

[00:10:50] Yeah.

[00:10:51] You saw the television is something that drew together and I saw the television is something that distracted from each of us.

[00:10:56] Right.

[00:10:57] And we learned how each other thought.

[00:10:59] Right.

[00:11:00] And we had to talk to each other and have communication about it because it wasn't that you hated the way I was brought up,

[00:11:08] right.

[00:11:09] You know, I just wanted to sit and watch a game.

[00:11:13] Why didn't you want to sit here with me and watch the game with me?

[00:11:16] I mean, what is this not good enough for you?

[00:11:18] Yeah.

[00:11:19] And that's how conflict starts and marriages.

[00:11:22] By not understanding the actual thing that's being said or how each other looking at things.

[00:11:29] So what we had to do is we had to sit and talk and we had to work it out and we had to explain, okay,

[00:11:37] this is how you look at pleasure time entertainment and enjoyment.

[00:11:44] This is how I see it.

[00:11:45] So now we're going to have to blend this together and support each other.

[00:11:49] Right.

[00:11:50] Come together with harmony.

[00:11:52] Right.

[00:11:53] So that we have peace in our home.

[00:11:55] Because the purpose and the goal of this particular sheet of music, right, is to spend relaxing time doing something together that builds us up and draws us closer together.

[00:12:09] Right.

[00:12:10] That's the purpose of this sheet of music that we're playing.

[00:12:13] But we were playing dissent notes on it and didn't, we're like, come over here and join me on the same page of music and without understanding.

[00:12:23] We couldn't do that.

[00:12:24] Right.

[00:12:25] Where we had to come together on was this is how we're going to do it.

[00:12:29] We're not going to have a 70 at this time.

[00:12:31] You know, you got to remember guys, this was in the early 90s.

[00:12:34] So this would have been a projection TV with 70 inch, whatever, projection, rear projection, television, whatever that way, 10,000 pounds.

[00:12:42] No, we were not going to have them.

[00:12:44] No, but our apartment was 500 square feet.

[00:12:47] The bigger the better.

[00:12:49] But you know, so we needed to get a TV that was going to fulfill the things that I need to fulfill.

[00:12:55] And that I could live with that you could live with.

[00:12:58] And also there were some boundaries, you know, you did not want it in the bedroom and I was like, why can't we have a TV in the bedroom?

[00:13:04] Mom and dad have a TV in the bedroom.

[00:13:06] And you're like, well, no, the bedroom is not for television.

[00:13:10] It's not restful.

[00:13:11] Yeah, because you didn't see it as restful where I've sitting from a TV and can follow sleep in 10 minutes.

[00:13:17] You know, and that's where again, this is where the harmony comes together of communication.

[00:13:24] This is where that love, right?

[00:13:27] Of being able to put the other person before yourself, realizing that they're putting you before themselves.

[00:13:36] Right?

[00:13:37] So then people say, oh, you're just compromising.

[00:13:39] Well, in a way, yeah, you are, but you're compromising to support one another.

[00:13:45] What you're not compromising on is the purpose that underlies it all.

[00:13:50] Right.

[00:13:51] We can compromise on some of the details of how that purpose gets accomplished.

[00:13:56] But the God-given purpose, that thing that it's resting on again, that that cord that you refer to, that third,

[00:14:02] right?

[00:14:03] Right.

[00:14:04] Right.

[00:14:05] Right.

[00:14:06] And if the purpose is us resting and drawing together, which is a purpose that God wants in a marriage,

[00:14:13] if that's the purpose, then we can negotiate, which notes on the scale we're playing

[00:14:19] Right.

[00:14:20] To come to that cord, but the purpose has to be there.

[00:14:23] That one never gets negotiated.

[00:14:25] Right.

[00:14:26] So, you know, we're talking about something simple and basic as a television or an energy.

[00:14:31] Or an entertainment choice.

[00:14:33] But, you know what?

[00:14:34] It's the same in all the decisions that you're going to make as a couple.

[00:14:38] Right.

[00:14:39] It's the same principle and it's the same model that you're going to use, that you're

[00:14:45] going to be taking what you have, what you've been taught, what you've learned or what

[00:14:50] you believe, and then you're going to work it out with your spouse so that it builds each

[00:14:56] other up.

[00:14:57] Right.

[00:14:58] And that's real peace.

[00:14:59] And it is.

[00:15:00] And both of you are going to have a baseline understanding of where God is in the matter.

[00:15:07] That's your first.

[00:15:08] Right.

[00:15:09] That's always your first note in the cord that you go to.

[00:15:11] You go, okay, what does God have to say about this?

[00:15:13] What is God purposing in this?

[00:15:15] And then you build the notes that each of you play around the note that he's playing.

[00:15:22] You know, and that comes into how you raise your children.

[00:15:25] It comes into how you decide where you're going to live.

[00:15:28] What jobs you're going to take or turn down, what schedules you're willing to keep.

[00:15:34] What activities are important and bedrock in your home that will always be there that

[00:15:39] will be in your daily routine or your weekly routine.

[00:15:41] And what activities are never ever allowed in your home.

[00:15:45] Right.

[00:15:46] What things will you just never do?

[00:15:48] Right.

[00:15:49] All of that.

[00:15:50] And it also comes into play, not just in the decision making, but it comes into play

[00:15:56] when weeks like we just had happened, when life happens, when there are stressors that come.

[00:16:02] And the environment around you changes over which you have no control.

[00:16:07] Right.

[00:16:08] And then the two of you are faced with, okay, how do we encounter this together?

[00:16:13] And how in the end are we going to basically make music with this?

[00:16:17] Right.

[00:16:18] So we can't change the notes that the environment around us is playing.

[00:16:23] It's playing the notes and some of them are loud and overbearing and some of them are

[00:16:28] dissonant, but that doesn't have to mean that the music that we're playing in the middle of it.

[00:16:34] You know, you've ever heard of, of course you have we've been to the symphony together.

[00:16:39] When a piece of music just gets loud and the percussion or the brass gets really, really into it.

[00:16:48] And then just all of a sudden this, this top strain of a violin just comes in over it.

[00:16:55] And the whole thing just kind of shifts.

[00:16:58] Right.

[00:16:59] You've heard that in all kinds of symphonies, it's a compositional device that's used and the best music that's ever written.

[00:17:07] That's what can happen in a marriage.

[00:17:09] There can be loud, overbearing, strife going on and this poor sweet note that God is

[00:17:17] playing comes in and then you begin to build around that instead of around the other.

[00:17:25] And you watch where if that's what you'll hang on to, if you hang onto what he is doing,

[00:17:31] then his piece settles into your relationship and the rest of the stuff around you may still be happening.

[00:17:39] They may still be playing all their notes, they may still be playing through it and weaving into it.

[00:17:46] And it becomes something altogether different.

[00:17:50] Yeah, this thing that we're talking about these nine things.

[00:17:54] Obviously we're talking about the fruit of the spirit.

[00:17:57] Right.

[00:17:58] And we're talking about how when we invite the Holy Spirit into our marriages,

[00:18:04] body invited him into our everyday lives.

[00:18:07] But a lot of times we leave him out of our marriages for some reason.

[00:18:12] But as we're inviting him into our marriages,

[00:18:15] we see how all these things build on top of each other.

[00:18:20] You can't just have love alone in a marriage.

[00:18:23] You can't just have joy in your marriage.

[00:18:26] And without joy without love, you're not going to have peace.

[00:18:31] Right. They're building lots.

[00:18:32] And they're building blocks and the thing is that when you have peace,

[00:18:37] it increases your joy.

[00:18:40] Right.

[00:18:41] When you have peace, it increases your love for one another because again,

[00:18:47] it builds on this trust thing that when I do this,

[00:18:53] you're going to build up.

[00:18:56] You're going to compliment me.

[00:18:58] You're going to lift me up even on things that we don't always agree on.

[00:19:03] Right.

[00:19:04] And that I think is one of the beautiful things that marriage has

[00:19:08] in that when the Holy Spirit is working in your marriage that you have.

[00:19:12] Right.

[00:19:13] So we've talked about the concept of what it is having peace in your marriage,

[00:19:18] what that looks like and we've drawn some metaphor there that kind of illustrates

[00:19:23] it but how do you get that?

[00:19:26] How do you build those notes around what God's doing?

[00:19:31] So the first thing is, is you're going to have to pray

[00:19:34] and you're going to have to talk to God.

[00:19:36] And you're going to have to ask God, ask the Holy Spirit into the marriage.

[00:19:40] So you can guide you.

[00:19:42] We can't come back to that, don't we?

[00:19:44] Yeah. You've got to ask him and you've got to listen and it sounds super simple.

[00:19:48] It does.

[00:19:49] And you would think that, oh yeah, well of course I'm going to do that.

[00:19:53] When's the last time?

[00:19:54] When's the last time you've done that?

[00:19:56] Well, and when you're in those situations that are loud and overwhelming,

[00:20:00] it's like you forget.

[00:20:01] Right.

[00:20:02] Because you're in the midst of it, you forget that is your source.

[00:20:06] But so when you've done that, you've asked your listening.

[00:20:11] But I think after that step, the next thing is as you've got to communicate with each other.

[00:20:17] Right.

[00:20:18] And you've got to realize what you are brought up with, what you're feeling,

[00:20:23] what you believe in a situation is as valid as what I am feeling

[00:20:28] and what I've been brought up and what I believe in a situation.

[00:20:31] Then you've got to be able to sit down and work it out without demeaning each other

[00:20:35] or without saying, well I'm right in your wrong or what I was brought up as the right way

[00:20:40] and what you were brought up in is stupid.

[00:20:42] Right.

[00:20:43] Got to get rid of that sort of mentality and interaction.

[00:20:47] Right.

[00:20:48] You've got to come to that place of recognizing that we're working together

[00:20:52] towards this purpose that God has set out.

[00:20:55] And sometimes it's helpful after you've prayed together and really

[00:20:59] sought and listened for a while, allowed God to speak to you either directly through the spirit

[00:21:05] or through his word or you've sought some counsel from others and allowed him to speak to you that way.

[00:21:11] It's helpful then to go before you even start into, well I think this is what we should do

[00:21:17] or this I think this is how we should address it from my background and my views.

[00:21:22] This is what I hear God saying about it.

[00:21:25] And you start your conversation there and then you build with what you're,

[00:21:30] because if you start it there, you're less likely to go into competition mode

[00:21:36] and more likely to go, okay we can agree here.

[00:21:41] Right.

[00:21:42] This is the baseline.

[00:21:43] And so this is what I see coming into this piece of music.

[00:21:47] You know I think maybe the Timpany should be played here.

[00:21:50] And you're like, ah, Timpany might be a little heavy handed.

[00:21:54] How about a little bit of clarinet?

[00:21:56] Right.

[00:21:57] Which you would never suggest because that's a wind.

[00:21:59] But it's a horrible instrument.

[00:22:01] But if you don't just pray, if you start your conversation with what are you hearing from God and you set that baseline first,

[00:22:10] then you can build it's easier to remember when you have differing opinions

[00:22:15] and differing notes that you want to play in different instrumentation that you want to bring to bear,

[00:22:20] it's easier to remember that you're still playing the same piece of music if you base it there.

[00:22:26] Right.

[00:22:27] And again this is where you're allowing the Holy Spirit to direct you and guide you that you're letting the love that you have for one another,

[00:22:36] because your love is a sacrificial love.

[00:22:40] Right.

[00:22:41] So you're letting your love for one another also guide you.

[00:22:45] And you said something a second ago that I want to just touch on is the word competition.

[00:22:51] And you know what?

[00:22:53] I think that competition gets in the way of marriages as a husband and wife.

[00:22:59] There is no more competition because there's no more me and you, we are now one.

[00:23:06] Right.

[00:23:07] And I'm not talking about you know we love to play each other in games, you know,

[00:23:12] and beat each other in games or we love to.

[00:23:15] But I'm talking about in the math of things.

[00:23:17] In life.

[00:23:18] Right.

[00:23:19] And life.

[00:23:20] And things that matter.

[00:23:21] There is no more competition.

[00:23:22] There is no more.

[00:23:23] I'm winning in this marriage and you're losing in this marriage.

[00:23:26] There's no.

[00:23:27] I'm winning in this argument or losing in this argument because both win or lose together.

[00:23:32] Because if the argument is sour and is go sour, you've both lost.

[00:23:37] Right.

[00:23:38] The only thing is for an argument is that you both are winners.

[00:23:42] Right.

[00:23:43] You both have to come out as the winners.

[00:23:45] And that I think is something that as we're talking about peace removes the peace so quickly

[00:23:52] from marriages is when they get competitive is when husbands and wives get competitive.

[00:23:59] And listen, they'll get competitive on winning arguments.

[00:24:03] The kids loving me or loving you or they oh, you're the mommy and you're the one who does everything

[00:24:10] or you're the dad and you don't do anything.

[00:24:13] Those are the things that really start undermining a marriage and undermining that love and that trust.

[00:24:21] Right.

[00:24:22] And that takes away the peace because you're now no longer supporting one another in harmony.

[00:24:27] Right.

[00:24:28] You're now dissing.

[00:24:30] You're now undercutting each other.

[00:24:32] You're now going, well you're playing this.

[00:24:34] I'm going to play this.

[00:24:36] You're making this.

[00:24:37] And you can be louder right?

[00:24:38] Yeah.

[00:24:39] What I do is going to be better because the kids are going to like it better.

[00:24:43] That is not at all what the marriage is about.

[00:24:46] It misses the whole two becoming one thing.

[00:24:49] Yeah.

[00:24:50] And so if I can encourage you right now if you're in this situation where and you know the words that you say to

[00:24:57] each other as married couples, if you're if you're in a constant thing of combat.

[00:25:03] Yeah.

[00:25:04] And going, you know, I've got to win this argument or I got to win this and that you know,

[00:25:09] if she buys this I've got to buy this or you know we got to keep equal or I'm got, you know, stop.

[00:25:15] Stop keeping a list of who does more around the house who does less around that.

[00:25:20] Those are not helpful.

[00:25:22] You both have a house that needs cared for.

[00:25:24] Yep.

[00:25:25] How are you both going to play a role in that and support one another?

[00:25:28] Yeah.

[00:25:29] Yeah.

[00:25:30] Understanding that that God given note underneath is that you two are to build a home together.

[00:25:37] Right.

[00:25:38] It really should be a peaceful place.

[00:25:40] One of the things that we've loved with our home and having four kids is four kids have lots of friends.

[00:25:47] Mm-hmm.

[00:25:48] And so we've had over the years many friends who've come through our, our house.

[00:25:53] And visited and been in there.

[00:25:56] It is always surprised me that when kids come over to our house within 15, 20 minutes of being

[00:26:00] our house they're laying on our couch and falling asleep.

[00:26:07] We've had so many kids take naps in our house.

[00:26:11] And we don't notice it because this is our normal.

[00:26:15] This is how we have lived our lives.

[00:26:17] We've lived our lives purposefully to have peace in our home.

[00:26:20] Right.

[00:26:21] And we support it.

[00:26:22] And then when we've added kids invited the kids to be just a part of it.

[00:26:26] Right.

[00:26:27] So it's becoming larger and larger cords in the music.

[00:26:31] Right.

[00:26:32] And we've taught this to them so that they are what they do support everything.

[00:26:36] And it's so funny.

[00:26:37] We've talked to so many of these kids who have come over and visited.

[00:26:41] And they go, when I came here it's so peaceful in your home.

[00:26:45] Which is not to say it's not loud.

[00:26:48] No, we have dogs that are barking all the time and the TV will be running or music

[00:26:53] will be playing or will be playing music or something.

[00:26:56] And he looked over and that kids fall asleep on the couch and you're like, are you okay?

[00:27:02] Were you tired?

[00:27:03] They were like, no, it was just so relaxing and peaceful being here.

[00:27:07] The feel like I can just relax here.

[00:27:10] And it's because even in the noise that happens in our home, it's not strife.

[00:27:15] No.

[00:27:16] It's just loud.

[00:27:17] It's always been an interesting thing to see how even when you strive for peace and

[00:27:22] stuff, even people who are not in your home, they see it.

[00:27:27] And they can even experience the peace you have by just being near you.

[00:27:33] That's a whole another thing.

[00:27:34] Well, because again, it's that thing of the Holy Spirit, right?

[00:27:37] Yeah, almost every spirit enters the room.

[00:27:39] It changes things.

[00:27:40] Yeah.

[00:27:41] It's back to that foundational premise that our homes, our marriages are supposed

[00:27:49] to be pictures to the world of the reconciliation man to the Father.

[00:27:55] Exactly.

[00:27:56] Well, we hope that this has helped you guys out.

[00:27:59] We are only a third of the way through.

[00:28:02] Yeah.

[00:28:03] Of the nine things.

[00:28:05] We would love to hear from you.

[00:28:06] We'd love to get some feedback.

[00:28:07] We've actually heard from some folks that have been listening to the podcast that are

[00:28:11] enjoying it.

[00:28:12] So we would love to hear from you and you can write us at DanAt Mathieu257.com and email us and let

[00:28:24] us know how you're enjoying these podcasts, what you like.

[00:28:29] Ask us questions if you have any questions.

[00:28:32] We would love to answer them, bring them up here.

[00:28:34] We'd love to hear some testimonies of the things that we're talking about and teaching

[00:28:38] about and how those things are affecting your life and the benefits of those things in

[00:28:45] your marriage.

[00:28:46] We want to thank you so much for listening and being part of the trim the Wicked Podcast.

[00:28:52] So we'll see you next week for trait number four.

[00:28:54] Yep, okay.

[00:28:55] Love you, bye.