1038. IJLMI: Into Community

[00:00:00] What's up, everybody? Welcome to my podcast, I'll Just Let Myself In. If this is your first time here, it is the podcast where we don't wait for an imaginary permission slip or a seat at an imaginary table. We let ourselves into our God-given doors. And I like to have entrepreneurs here sometime who are doing things that I think are a little bit out of the box, a little bit fun, something that I think will inspire you. And so today we're going to get right into an episode with an artist who has a collective, I would say, called A Few.

[00:00:30] A Few More Friends where she has been focused on getting people engaged in a real life experience for music. Ladies and gentlemen, without further ado, welcome to the podcast, Blair Amanda. Hi. Welcome. Welcome, welcome. Thanks for having me. That was a nice intro. I try. I try. We've been in proximity since she was a little girl. Yeah. And so it didn't dawn on me that she was 25 years old. I'm like, are you a freshman in college? Because you look so young. I know. That's a beautiful thing.

[00:00:59] Hold on to that fountain of youth. Yeah. People keep telling me. I'm like, but y'all need to take me serious. Yeah. I'm not 15 anymore. Well, people will take you seriously. Trust me. You take yourself seriously. Mm-hmm. You know, get that tone together. Mm-hmm. Speak in complete sentences. Don't say LOL when you don't mean LOL. Don't laugh when you don't mean to laugh. That's real. That's real. Take it seriously. They'll take it seriously. You have a collective called A Few More Friends. Mm-hmm.

[00:01:26] And the tagline is followers watch. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Friends show up. Yeah. Right? And I love that because we're in a generation of people who just follow and watch you online. They may like your content. They may not like it. They may see everything and never leave a comment or never click. But friends really do show up. So what inspired you to start this?

[00:01:48] Yes. So I moved to Los Angeles three years ago. I had no friends. I had no family. I didn't even have a connection there. I just had a dream in my heart and I was like, God told me I'm supposed to be out there. And so I just believed since I was 12, I'm supposed to be in LA doing music. And that's exactly what's happening.

[00:02:09] And so I moved out there and it was a lot. It's a whole journey. We'll get into it. It was up and down. But I got connected with some people in a church community.

[00:02:46] Mm-hmm. And we're like, you're just a cool person and we want to be in your corner. So I started just throwing live music events in my backyard with my friend just to have fun in the summertime. And then I was like, I can be making money off this low key. I can make a business out of this. Yeah. And so I just started making money from it by charging people to come watch my friends and I perform.

[00:03:14] And then I started targeting like independent artists because I noticed there was an issue in Los Angeles where a lot of independent artists, they don't want to be signed to a label. They don't want to be signed to this agency because they're taken advantage of and being exploited by a lot of management, industry, live music venues. So I was like, I want to give independent artists a platform where they can experience what I experienced, which is sincere support and people who are actually going to follow their journey as an artist before they blow up and things like that.

[00:03:42] So that's kind of what started it. Yeah. And with the indie artist thing, it's like you already don't make a whole lot of money. So the little bit of money that you do make, you're not trying to give it to management and this team and that team until you really get on. And so I think it's a really cool thing that you have going on. What has been one of the biggest lessons that you've learned as an entrepreneur versus just being an artist in this space?

[00:04:06] I think with entrepreneurship, there's like a lot of things and I'm newer to the game, but I would say being careful about who you do business with. And just because people are nice to you or like you doesn't mean you should do business with them and having boundaries. Like it's okay to communicate your boundaries.

[00:04:35] I felt like it was really awkward when I was looking for people to help me because I was like, I don't really have anything to pay you right now. Yeah. But people believed in this dream and I met some really great people. They've become friends. But communicating my boundaries was really awkward because I was like, this is my baby. Yeah. This is something that God put on my heart, but like this is not a group thing. This is something that I worked really hard on.

[00:05:00] Like I'm over here praying over, crying over, researching over, almost giving up on, making flyers for staying up till four o'clock in the morning, waking up at 2 a.m. to work on while working a full-time job separately because I'm not just an entrepreneur full-time right now. Mm-hmm. So I think communicating like, hey, this is my thing. Yeah. And it's not wrong to say that it's my thing, you know. I think that was a little awkward for me. Yeah.

[00:05:26] Because I'm not used to communicating my boundaries. Yeah. And being okay with that, that it's not a bad thing. It's not wrong. Yeah. You know, to be like, this is not your thing and it's okay. And you are just volunteering. Yeah. That's okay. And also I think, you know, it's funny. It's so important. I'm going to give you a little nugget here. Big sister nugget.

[00:05:50] It's important that you find people who really want to be in service to what God is doing in your life. Right? Yeah. Because, and I pay the people who work for me except my husband because technically I work for him. He's funding the whole operation. Period. Period. But, but generally, you know, I have a manager who gets a percentage and things of that nature. Yeah.

[00:06:15] But when there's been other people in my life who wanted to help or whatever, I often observe, because you don't really, you can't know this until something happens. And, you know, I observe, do they see this as them serving something God wants to do on the earth? Mm. Mm-hmm. Or do they see this as a means to an end? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

[00:06:53] Yeah. I'll give you a perfect example. My manager. He been with me through thick, thin, up, down, not making no money at all. He believes, and he don't need me. He got businesses of his own, money of his own, job, a better car than me, got a house. Like, it's not like he's, you know what I mean? Yeah. Like, I'm his ticket. Yeah. Please.

[00:07:23] Okay? But he believes that God wants to do something through me. So guess what? When I pivot and say, actually, I don't want to make music anymore. He's not like, we just put all these years into you. He's like, okay, so what do you want to do? Mm. All right, boom. Let's get, you know. And that, to me, is a little, I've had opportunities to be managed by people who are more successful and whatever, whatever. And I will never, I will never, he will have to leave me. Mm.

[00:07:50] Because there is something so valuable about a person who you can trust because their service is to God. It's not to you. Right. You know what I mean? Right. And you'll know that, too, because they won't feel like they need to take over. Mm. People come up, people come around me with the takeover spirit. I go, oh, no. Mm-hmm. You're not here for me. Yeah. You're not here for God. Yeah. You're here for yourself. Mm-hmm. You're not here. Mm-hmm. And that's cool, but it ain't going to work out. Right. God bless you. Be warm and well fed. This is not the place for you. Right. You know?

[00:08:20] And I had to do that to people I love. I'm like, yeah, you just. Yeah. For the sake of our friendship, we should not do business. Yeah, really. Because you want to take over and it's not your thing. Yeah. Yeah, so don't feel bad about that. This is a good muscle for you to flex. Thank you. I wish I flexed that at 25. Yeah. That's good. It's awkward, but I'm okay with it. Yeah. I think it's worth it. I think that's a great point. Yeah. What are they here for? Yeah. You know? Yeah. Yeah. And can God do this without them? Yeah. The answer's always yes. A hundred percent. The answer's always yes. Yeah. You don't even have to.

[00:08:50] Don't wait. I'm like, God, do you want me to do this? Like, you know? It could be done without you. Mm-hmm. Sometimes you got to show people that. Yeah. Mm-hmm. You can't stop the show, baby. Yeah. It's going to happen without you. Yeah. God is deeply in control. Yeah. Yeah. Absolutely. Absolutely. So when you're doing music as a Jesus lover, right? Yeah. But who's not making gospel music, so to speak, what are some of the boundaries that you have about maybe places you will go or won't go or things you'll sing about or won't sing about? Yeah.

[00:09:17] Or are you still discovering that? No. Yeah. I think message, your message is everything. I've been into my Afro beats lately. Yeah. And I have a song coming out and it's called Nobody. And I just performed it at this worship and matcha event that my homegirl put on. It was so fire. But I'm learning that the message is way more important than just the image that you present to people.

[00:09:44] And so in the song, it goes like, nobody, nobody, nobody understands me like you do. And so I like my messages to be very general but easy to apply to God. And so it's something where if you spend time with it and you listen to it, you might be thinking about anybody. But I am very intentional with who I'm talking about. And most of my songs are actually a message to God or it's me working through my pain. Yeah. And so then when I go to perform it, I explain the message.

[00:10:12] And so people know why I wrote it, but I don't have to be like, I'm a Christian Jesus lover. I am, but I'm not going to be weird about it. And so I'm noticing this theme with people failing me and each other. And you know that scripture where it's like the heart and the flesh may fail, but God is my portion forever. I'm learning like people are designed to fail. It's in their human nature. They're designed to fail. But God is not designed to fail me or he would have by now.

[00:10:41] You know? So my message is more around that. It's kind of drawing attention away from people and shining it on God. Like God does not, it says love never fails. And God is the perfect example. Yeah. He is love and he emulates it perfectly. So it's trying to push the attention toward God without making people uncomfortable and putting this blanket statement of you have to be a Christian in order to understand God's love. Like you're already loved. You already belong. You're already enough.

[00:11:10] And I'm just here to show you that. I'm here to like point you to access to someone who views you differently. Yeah. So I've been on that vibe and everybody love Afrobeat. It's summer. Like, and even if they don't get that, they're still dancing like, eh. It's vacation music too. Yeah. They don't know. So they're having a vibe and that's where I've been. So I want to be a Christian artist, but like, I don't think I need to say or label myself as a Christian artist. I'm a Christian and I carry myself as a Christian through my music.

[00:11:40] So yeah. Yeah. I think that's important too. I think everything we need, we need Christians in every space. Yeah. Right. And I think sometimes when you come into a space, you know, super, super, I'm Christian, I'm Christian, I'm Christian. Some people are just not going to hear you, you know? And I think, you know, some of us have a little bit of a way of like, I think I have a way of, um, I lead with my relationship with God, but it doesn't repel people. Yeah.

[00:12:08] But I just think that's because I'm from Best Eye and, you know, I'm just cool. You know what I'm saying? Like the way my mom raised me, you know, we just, you feel me? I'm a Brooklyn girl. So you're going to feel loved when you're in my presence. Yeah. But I also think there's, there's important, and we were talking about our friend Tiara earlier. Tiara is so big on this, you know, sharing your life with people also that you don't have to always lead in that way. And I think there's so much value to that.

[00:12:33] Um, you know, you were raised in church as a preacher's kid, both parents and ministry. Um, and so there's a, I feel like there's a weight, you know, I've been in ministry most of my adult life, but my parents were not. So I kind of got to come of age for myself. Yeah. You know, who, as who I was in my own skin. Sometimes I feel like for preacher's kids, it's a little bit difficult.

[00:13:00] So now that you're 25 and you kind of step that on your own, you live in a different place and you're doing your own thing. How has being a preacher's kid served you well? Mm. Mm. And what are some of the, some of the ways that it maybe has been difficult? Yeah. That's a great question. I would say the ways that it served me well. I have been protected from a lot of stuff that I'm grateful for. Yeah. I don't have no kids. I have friends that have kids right now. Yeah.

[00:13:30] I literally saw this post and it was like, it was on TikTok and it was like, if you're ever feeling sad, just think that there's someone your age with a three-year-old right now. And I literally commented. I was like, that made me feel so much better because having a three-year-old right now, that's just a sacrifice that I don't, I'm too selfish, unfortunately. Sorry. I don't want to feed you. I want my, I want the nuggets. Like. And the fourth. Yeah. I want all of it. And CPS would be called on me because I didn't feel like getting up. I'm sorry.

[00:13:59] So I'm grateful for certain things being in place that protected me, you know, like they didn't want me dating at a certain age. They want me being alone with boys. Okay. I get it. Teenagers, they have hormones, all that stuff. So I get it in terms of it protected me from a lot of spaces, a lot of people that I could have been harmed. I think my parents love me a lot, you know, so I'm really grateful for that. I didn't have this traumatic childhood. I know a lot of people from my parents' generation, they did.

[00:14:28] And so I'm proud of the way that they parented because they're nothing like how they were raised. And it's no shade. I love my grandparents. Of course. I love y'all. But they didn't know what they were doing. Every generation gets a little bit better. A little bit better. Yeah. So I'm grateful for that. But I think being a preacher's kid and being a girl, I was a firstborn, I do think it is all dependent on the individual. So I don't like to make general statements and saying all preacher's kids. Because my brother turned out very different than I did. Yeah.

[00:14:58] And we live in the same household. Every child has a different parent. Yeah. Yeah. You all have this different parent. Isn't that crazy? Yeah. So speaking for me, I think what was hard was I'm naturally a people pleaser. So I deeply care about what people think of me. And I think that just comes from different insecurities, like being a dark skinned black girl growing up around people where it was just like, if you're light skinned, you're prettier. And I feel like I had to perform a lot. I had this revelation like not too long ago.

[00:15:27] And it was like, I realized that I never made a choice to go to church. Like some people had their call to Jesus moment and they're like, I'm going to go to church. I was just always there. Yeah. I never was like, I'm going to get up and go to church because I was there at eight o'clock in the morning and not leaving until after 4 p.m. And I didn't really know why, but I always knew I had a spotlight on me. I realized like, okay, I never made that choice on my own.

[00:15:51] It was just something I did because my parents brought me here, but I had this spotlight on me that I didn't ask for. And so when my dad would preach and then bring up my name and now I wasn't in like the big church service because we had like the separate kids service. So I remember my dad did this sermon and it started talking about how I needed help with like math because I was struggling. And I remember coming out of the class and people were like, I didn't know you were struggling with math. And I'm like, how did you know that?

[00:16:20] People were like, if you need a tutor at any time, like I can help you out. And I'm like, I don't want help from you. I don't know who you are. And I realized, oh, like my dad is talking, not necessarily badly about me, but just, I didn't, I didn't know that I was, my business was going to be put out there in front of 600 people because our church was really big. And so that's when I started noticing, oh, people are watching me. People are going to know my business before I know that they know my business. And I was uncomfortable with that, but I didn't know really what to do. I was like, okay, I guess my dad is just preaching.

[00:16:50] But then it just became kind of intense as I got older because I felt like people felt entitled and like, because they knew my parents that they could give me unsolicited advice that they could pull me over and say, hey, like you shouldn't be doing that. Or, hey, I heard this about you. Maybe you should change that. And I'm like, okay. And that was individual people. I'm trying to also learn like, I learned this recently.

[00:17:16] The entire church did not say, okay, it was individual people. And someone challenged me with that. They're like, name the people. I was like, oh, okay. It's this one person that said this that made me uncomfortable. It's this one person that made me cry. I remember we had this teen event and I don't know if they're going to cancel me for saying this or whatever, but it's fine. I'll edit it out if it's bad. Go ahead. It's not really that bad. We just had this event and it made me really, it was fear factor. So, you know, when you had to like eat the nasty stuff or whatever.

[00:17:42] And I felt so much pressure to do something I didn't want to do because people were watching me and expecting for me to perform well. And I think that that trend just like never left. And I'm singing at church. I'm, people don't know, like my mom and I would sing at church together, but they didn't know the conversation that happened before I got up on stage. They didn't know the argument that happened right before. My mom would be like, y'all need to stop. And then run out the window and be like, hey.

[00:18:09] And so I was kind of learning this like, oh, church is a place I come to to perform. That's what I learned. I don't think they were trying to do that. Of course. But I just learned like, this is not a place where people see the real me. This is where I put my best foot forward and I hide my worst foot, you know? And so church was like a Sunday service only that I came to show up as my best self. And I didn't let anybody see me sin. And when I did sin, I was like, well, I guess I just kind of talked to God about it and beat

[00:18:38] myself up about it because I shouldn't be doing this, but I don't know who to go to because I don't want to get rebuked in a way where I'm feeling like rebuke is actually a beautiful thing. Yes. But I didn't know that because I thought it was a time to, for someone to tell me how terrible I am. I'm like, I already feel terrible. I know that I did something wrong. So it just created this issue with myself and with my identity. And I felt like I was living for the approval of people constantly.

[00:19:06] And I didn't want to let my parents down. And so it kind of just trickled into this thing in my adulthood where I was like, I don't know who I am outside of church. And I don't know who I am outside of the preacher's kid or the preacher's daughter. And the real issue was, I really don't think it was people. It was, I had, there's a verse that says zeal without knowledge is no good and hasty feet miss the way.

[00:19:35] And I think I was deeply passionate, but deeply uneducated about Jesus. Yeah. And I think that's why I ran into so many issues because I just wasn't taught like, go to God, ask for his opinion. I was taught, well, maybe ask somebody else for their opinion and then they'll tell you about God, you know? They get vice culture. Yeah. So I think that was the issue there that I wasn't learning the proper like dependence mechanism.

[00:20:00] It's depend on God, ask him and then ask somebody, you know, like, and then go discern with God about what that person just told you. Right. You know, that was like an out of the world type of thing. And I learned that in my adulthood. Same. And I had to kind of go through some things. And I remember like going through a period where I was like, I don't know who God is. Mm-hmm. And I feel like I'm being told who he is and I don't like the version of God that I'm being told. You know? Mm-hmm. I feel like he's a king. He just cares about me doing everything perfect.

[00:20:30] Right. Mm-hmm. And I felt like I had to earn my salvation through being perfect. Yeah. And earning everybody's approval. And not even thinking about what does it look like to earn his approval. Yeah. Oh, I don't need to earn it. Oh, salvation's a gift. Yeah, the whole thing. But that was like a longer journey for me. Yeah. And I felt like I had more delays in my walk with God because I was just focused on the wrong thing. Yeah. You know? Yeah. So I feel like I'm yapping, but. No. That's the point. You're on a podcast, girl. Yappity, yeah. But what I will say is the journey is continuing. Yeah. Right?

[00:21:00] You're not off of it. There will be new revelations. Things you'll be like, oh, that's why I'm like that. Well, whoa. Yeah. That's, you know. And one of the things that I, my guest before you was a prophet. Oh. And I was telling her that I was not raised to even believe that anyone outside the Bible could be a prophet. I was not raised to believe in healing. Like a, like a, even though the Bible says, if you, any of you who are sick, the elders should come lay hands.

[00:21:30] I was not raised to take that scripture. Jesus. I was raised at the Holy Spirit's. My agenda was to make disciples. I was raised that the only time you invoke the Holy Spirit is when you need somebody to come to church with you. I was raised, like I was raised in some odd things. Right? Good intentions. Yeah. Good intentions. Yeah.

[00:21:53] Um, in your twenties and thirties, you start to come to a realization about who God is. The God of the Bible is. And it is so precious because it's exactly what you said. You realize salvation is a gift. Yeah. Yeah. So because it's a gift. Yes, you do want to share it with other people. Yeah. But also salvation is so much more than you coming to church with me. Right.

[00:22:23] Salvation is so much more than me being at church. Wake it up. Yeah. Come on. It's so much more than just me showing up at church and showing up at a midweek service. Yeah. It's so much more than that. Yeah. And I think so many Christians are miserable. So many people in ministry are miserable because they have reduced. Yeah. God's role in their life to them. Yeah. Being at church. Yes. Bringing somebody to church.

[00:22:53] Mm-hmm. Bringing somebody to Christ. Yeah. That's it. Getting them in the water. All good things. Yeah. All good things that you should be doing. Yeah. But when you reduce God down to what you can do and everything is about self-denial and about all these things. Yeah. Yes. All these so much focus on you and you are such a flawed human. Mm-hmm. You're going to feel empty. You're not going to feel the power of God. Yeah.

[00:23:21] You're not going to feel like God can change these things in your life or change these things in the world. And then it becomes a big navel gaze at what you and your community and your church can do. Yes. And provide for you. Mm-hmm. It's very dark. It is. It's very, very dark. And I get around people and I start talking like this and they get weird. And I'd be like, oh, poor baby. Yeah. You just not there yet. Yeah. And it's okay. It's masked as light. Yeah. But you also have to remove yourself too. Yes. Mm-hmm.

[00:23:47] Because so I liken it like this and we're getting hooky, but it's okay. I liken it like this. Mm-hmm. When I left New York and went to Atlanta, I missed New York so bad. The first time I visited, I said, oh, it's time for me to go home. And my friend was like, you are home. New York is home. I said, no. This is insanity. I got on the train. I could not believe some of the stuff I saw on the train. Somebody exposed themselves to me on the train. The train is crazy. Yeah.

[00:24:16] But I did this every day. It didn't seem dirty to me. It didn't seem nasty to me. It didn't seem unsafe to me because I did it every day. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Now, if you go to the same church talking about the same stuff with the same people Yeah. And you don't experience anything different ever. I'm not saying we should go to the same church. You should be a part of a congregation that you're consistent and allegiant to. But if you don't ever experience anything else, you will think things are fine that are really not fine. Yeah.

[00:24:46] You will think things and ways of thinking and even ways of worship and patterns are great that are really mediocre. Yeah. Maybe even bad. Yeah. Yeah. You will think these things because you have no other experience. And I get worried for people. Yeah. That just refuse to even try to think differently about things. Yeah. Because I'm like, man, you are limiting what God could show you. Yes.

[00:25:13] You know, and so I'm constantly studying out things that I was not raised in. Not so much because I want to change my mind because sometimes they just solidify. I'm like, yeah, what I was taught was right. Yeah. You're good. I'm good on that. Like, you know. Thank you for that. But it's also helpful to expand my mind because I want to know and believe in the majesty and the mystery of Christ.

[00:25:37] And if I can explain everything by these tenets and principles and studies and everything has explanation. Yeah. And anything I can't explain, I just stay away from. Yeah. Because we really can't explain that. So we just stay away from that. Right? It's not good. Isn't that crazy? It is crazy. I'm learning the art of asking questions. Like, that has changed my time with God. That's great. It's so simple.

[00:26:03] And like, Paul, someone I've recently connected with because I was really having issues with my identity and like, just like, oh my gosh. Paul's good for that. Who am I? What's going on? I'm literally on a walk sobbing because I was reading. I was like, God, I need help. Like connecting with someone who can help me work through what I'm feeling or going through and like dealing with all this stuff. And like what you're saying is so good because like it also just reveals like how little or how much people observe Jesus.

[00:26:32] Like when they're reading the Bible, like Jesus moved around a lot. He had his people with him. So he's communicating like it's important to have community, but move around, like talk to different people. He wasn't afraid of people who didn't think like him. Exactly. He wasn't dismissive of people who didn't think like him. I'm like, when you really spend time with Jesus, you start to, it calms my mind down. I'm like, amen. You just aren't spending time with Jesus.

[00:26:57] But with Paul, I noticed like I was curious, like why was he so passionate about killing Christians? But then like what change, like why was that change so serious and like permanent? Yeah. You know? Like why was that? And like I was studying. I was like, okay, so who's Saul? And like what happened? But it was this misunderstanding. Like he was really, he was not killing Christians because he hated them. He was killing them because he was in deep misunderstanding.

[00:27:27] He says he was ignorant and in unbelief. And I'm like, wow. Like Jesus, when he met him on the road to Damascus, I think that changed everything because he actually met Jesus. And Jesus was like, you are hurting me. Had an encounter. And I was, you know, I thought about that. I'm like, if what he was doing in his mind was not right. His heart, he was trying to please God. He was like, you guys don't understand. Like the Messiah is not here yet. Like he's doing this in an attempt to please God.

[00:27:54] He's doing this with like, it was just misplaced, you know? But his intention was actually good. And the way I grew up was he killed Christians. He killed Christians. That's all I knew. That guy was bad. And then God changed him. Yeah. And then God changed him. But he actually desired to please God. He was just deeply miseducated in how to do that. And that's when I was like, oh my God, I relate to him. I was so ignorant because I had this system of what I thought. And I thought I knew Jesus.

[00:28:21] I thought this is how you please Jesus by following all these rules. And then God just, I guess my encounter wasn't like he met me on the road. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But he did strip me from all of what I knew and showed me like, this is who I actually am at my worst moment. Because I thought that the God that I served would only bless me when I did something right and when I lived a life earning his blessing. But he blessed me with moving to California at the time where I least deserved it.

[00:28:50] I didn't really believe in him that much at that point. I was like doing what I wanted. And I was using people. I was like, well, if I go out there and live with some lady from church, maybe she'll give me some free rent. Like that was my heart. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And for God to bless me and open every single door when I did nothing to earn it, I said, you might not be who I thought you were. I kind of want to get to know who this is. It was so different. Yeah. And it's very freeing. And everything you're saying, I'm like, yeah, I'm just learning to pray for people. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

[00:29:18] Like, you know, you just, and to pray for myself, to not judge them. Because I'm like, girl, you was just there like three years ago. This is new for me. And you'll be there again. Amen. In 10 years, I'll be looking at some of the stuff I'm doing now going, why was I doing that? You know what I mean? Because I look at some of the stuff I was doing 10 years ago and was like, that was crazy. Like, you know, why was I saying, why was I doing that? Why was I teaching that? Because even that, that's one. I had to go back and say, I'm sorry I taught you that. That was inaccurate. Wow. That was false doctrine. Wow. Actually.

[00:29:48] It's real. That's not what the Bible says. The Bible says, do not give up meeting together. That does not mean missing a midweek. And I'm sorry I said that to you. That's real. That does not mean missing a service or a devotional. Yeah. You know what I mean? Give up is not missing one or two things. You know what I mean? Mm-hmm. Um, misquoting scripture. Mm-hmm. These are things that, or not looking at things in full context, you know? Yeah. So, so yeah.

[00:30:15] And I'm sure that there are things that I'm doing today that in 10 years, I'll be like, now that was crazy. Like, you know what I mean? So, and I think that's why it's so important to be humble and to be a student. Yeah. And to be able to admit openly when you've learned something or when you've had revelation about something. I'm always asking God, give me revelation. Teach me. Yeah. Show me, you know, what this word means for me in this season of my life and for this generation. Yeah. You know, because you've been trusting me with a platform and I want to be responsible with it. Yeah. You know?

[00:30:43] And so I think it's fun because it releases you from the pressure of having to be right. Like, I tell myself all the time. If I get up here and say, I'll be, cause I be yapping on mics and in cameras and I will come up here tomorrow and say, y'all know what I said in that last interview? That was completely wrong. That's real. It takes the pressure off me. Yeah. And I feel like the way I, and I can't, I'm not going to blame anybody or any institution for this. I just think it's the way I interpret it. Yeah. Bro.

[00:31:09] I had to be so sure of anything I said, of anything I told, of anything I, you know, be prepared to answer, be prepared to give an account, you know, handle the word of truth correctly. It was so, um, works based and so much on me and me being a disciple and me being an example and me, and it was, it was bondage. Yeah. Um, because nobody can live up to that. Talk about that. Nobody can live up to that. Yeah.

[00:31:37] The people who walked with Jesus betrayed him when the going got tough. Yeah. They walked with Jesus. Yeah. Literally. Yeah. And so how much more difficult is it for us to not betray him? Maybe we won't betray him the way that, that Peter did, but in other ways, you know, we will betray him if we don't, we'll betray him even if we try our hardest. Yeah.

[00:32:03] And so really giving myself that grace spiritually, because here's the way I feel like God gets church kids. Right. Most of us are not going to go out and like smoke crack. Right. Most, some of us have, but most of us are not going to go out and be doing like crazy, crazy, crazy stuff. It's sins of the heart.

[00:32:34] Mm-hmm. Guilt is a faith issue. Hallelujah. They're not ready. Guilt is a faith issue. It is. You don't believe that what I did for you on the cross is enough. Yeah. Mm-hmm. So it's an issue. Yeah. And if people could really grasp, I say this time, I'm blue on the face. If you listen to this podcast often, you probably tired of, you probably know what I'm about to say. You probably tired of it.

[00:32:56] But if we could grasp that God is not disappointed in us at all, that it is his absolute pleasure to bless us. Yeah. It's when you say, oh, he did it when I least deserved it. It was his pleasure. Yeah. It was his pleasure. He's not like us. He's not like our parents. Oh, God. It is his absolute pleasure to do good things for us, even when we don't deserve it. Yeah.

[00:33:21] If we could grasp that and hold on to it, because sometimes I grasp it, but then I forget. Right. If I could hold on to it. That's real. I know that it really changes the day that I'm having, the week that I'm having, the month that I'm having, especially as an artist, which we're going to get into. Mm-hmm. Because as an artist, there's so much insecurity that comes with what we do. Right? You're performing. Yeah. Right? You talked about being performative. It's in our nature to perform. Yeah. You know what I mean? I could be having the worst day in the world.

[00:33:51] These cameras turn on. I'm like, welcome to my pocket. You know, I got to turn it on. Yeah. You know? And I think there's some gifting in that. Mm-hmm. But if you're not careful, which sometimes I'm not, it can take over and you can feel lost in your identity. Mm-hmm. So as a believer, as someone who is fighting daily to stay close to God, in the artist space, what do you feel like is your biggest challenge spiritually?

[00:34:19] I think it's staying focused. And you know the verse where it says to set your mind above? Set your heart on things above? Yeah. It's really hard to do that when everyone in the room is not thinking that way. Mm-hmm. And so it's not impassable.

[00:35:02] Mm-hmm. I think it's not disciples in the room with me. I struggle more. Yeah. To just stay focused. Yeah. Even if it's as simple as like, oh, like this is not about me, you know? Yes. Because people will say like, oh my gosh, if I'm performing, I'll host the event, curate it, and perform in the event. I've done it. Which is a lot. Yeah. And people will come up to me and they're like, oh my gosh, you're so good. I love your voice. And I'm like, thank you, you know?

[00:35:29] Because someone once told me, they were like, you know, you should say praise God. And I'm like, well, that's a little awkward. Like, yes, praise God. But I'm not going to be like, I just feel like that's unnatural for me. Yeah. And I genuinely like, thank you, you know? Thank you, yeah. But I get caught up in like, oh, like God put this on. I have this access and these opportunities only because of God. Yep. All of them come from him. I've gotten venues for free. Really, really cool connections. Headliners that I'm like, this is only God.

[00:35:58] But I would say not making it about me or forgetting that none of this happened because of me. None of this is happening just for me. Yeah. And that God is always doing something bigger than what I can see and what's in front of me. Because sometimes I limit the success, you know, to the experience that I had. Oh, we made this money from this. Oh, this cool person connected me to this. Or oh. This person came. This person reposted it. Yeah. This person. It's like God is always thinking way farther.

[00:36:25] And like, I feel like this is just something that he's like, oh, you cute little girl. You don't understand. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I have something way bigger. Because even me moving to LA, I thought, okay, I'm moving out here. I'm going to make money. I'm going to, you know, be an artist. And God, I think his purpose for me to move out there was to find him again. Like, that was it. You know? All this other stuff is like cool. I felt that about Atlanta. Yeah. I feel like because I, I tell people, I, I landed in Hartsfield, Jackson. Broken.

[00:36:55] A broke down disciple. I was like, I don't even know if I'm going to be, I was like, I'm going to go to church because I got to go to church. But I'm sitting on a back row. I ain't doing nothing. Like, I ain't serving. I ain't leading. Yep. By the time I left Atlanta, I was an associate minister in the church. Isn't that crazy? But yeah. Yeah. Sometimes he will move you to get you, to get you back. That's exactly what it was. I'm thinking, I'm going to go over here, make music. And I did. But actually three years later, this whole music thing, I've been out there for three years, but I did speech.

[00:37:25] I do speech and language therapy for LAUSD. So I'm teaching and doing something that I don't really love, but I know I'm helping people. So it's, it's nice, but I can't lie. I'm like, all right, I'm tired of saying, open your mouth and let's do the R sound. Like, I'm tired of that. That's not who I am. Yeah. But I'm grateful because it's like, okay, without, I'm complaining about work because I have a job. Yeah. You know, I'm complaining about these things because I have these opportunities. Yeah. So I'm grateful, but it took time of God cultivating my relationship with him in personal

[00:37:55] and finalizing it. Like, this is my personal relationship with Jesus. Finally, after 10 years of like going, you know what I'm saying? Going on this journey. I'm like, oh my gosh, it wasn't personal this whole time. I think that's the win. And so whether this business becomes successful or not, or it gets bigger or doesn't, or handed to somebody else, I think that the, that God's goal for me was met. That like, I found him. I trust him and it's authentic. Like it's mine. It's real. Everything else. I'm just like smiling. I'm happy about it. I'm failing forward.

[00:38:25] Yes. And I'm okay with it. There's a program from a church actually called Angel City Business Lab. So it's a church called Angel City, but they have this nonprofit called Angel City Business Lab. And one of my friends from church, she just shared me about, shared with me about this program that she did. And so I was like, okay, like I'll go and see what this is. It's an eight week business program. And it's literally dedicated to helping people with startup businesses or established businesses. And they fund your business. Wow.

[00:38:54] If you complete the program and show up or whatever. So I did the eight weeks. I showed up. They funded the program. It was amazing. And I was like, God, this is so cool. This is only because of you. Yeah. And I feel like the funding coming from this church and all that, it just helped my mind. Yeah. Like this is not about me. This is not being funded or happening through me. Yeah. I think God wants me to do this, but my mentor back home, she was like, Blair, you have to be careful. You have to be in your word.

[00:39:23] Like you have to be, you know? And I'm like, yeah, I want to be in my word, but I can't have a lazy day. I can't because I show up and the energy is so intense where it's like, if I am not like, okay, God, like, you know, with the verse about the treasures being stored in heaven, like that has been my anchor because I have to remember that like the success of this business so far, like all of it can be stolen. It can die out. I can lose the money.

[00:39:52] I can lose my volume on TikTok. I can lose all of that. And it's okay because the treasure I'm trying to store up is the relationships I'm building. Love is never going to run out. Helping other people, you know, is never going to run out. And these artists, we're giving them a real platform. We're connecting them with real opportunities and people. So it is, it's nice, but I feel like I have been the person who's connecting everybody. And so I've been kind of struggling with my artistry because I'm like, I'm performing,

[00:40:19] but I'm not performing at the level I want to because it's not really all about me right now. It's about helping these other artists get connected and get a platform. But I love it because I need to stay humble. And I don't really actually want to be a full-time singer. I kind of want to be a songwriter, work in the background, do my songs here and there, do a little drop here. I want to be like Drake and like drop a song overnight. I'm into that. People are like, that's not good. You know, you need to build it up. So whatever. But I've met a lot of cool artists and a lot of cool people.

[00:40:47] And I'm honestly just happy to be in this season of like, I'm just having fun, making cool connections and, you know, helping people out. But yeah, I think that would be the biggest thing. I love that there's a sense of joy in what you're doing. You love it. You're having a good time. And I love that you're flexible. Like for me, I am always encouraging people who are younger than me to like, just stay flexible, you know, stay. What do they say?

[00:41:17] The mission needs to be in pen, but the method needs to be in pencil. Right? So the mission, you know what your mission is. My mission has always been to inspire and encourage people. Sometime the method was ministry. Sometime the method was music. Now the method is media. You know what I mean? And I can still do all three very well. Period. And so that's the beautiful thing about being gifted. You can do whatever. You know what I mean? You can be an artist. You can be an entrepreneur. You can be a connector. You can be a songwriter.

[00:41:45] You can be the one singing the song. God is going to breathe on it either way, you know, because it's you. One of the things that I do in terms of the question that I asked you, you know, spiritually to help me as an artist and even as a creator in this space now as someone with a media platform and as someone with a media company, now as a producer and a project manager, one of the things that I do to keep myself very humble is remember that God can do this without me.

[00:42:14] If I decide to stop today, his mission in the earth is going to happen. It's not me. I'm not the special sauce. Yeah. Because people will try to pump you. You're just so, you're so. Yeah. You're so. People hold my hand. You're so real. You're just so. And if you're not, and I am. Yeah. I am so real and so wise and so whatever y'all think I am. But also, I ain't. Yeah. You know what I mean? Yes. Also, I'm not that wise. Yeah. Also, I'm not that great.

[00:42:42] And I think that there's a real humbling but also honest look that you have to have within yourself when you look in that mirror and you understand that yes, it could be taken away. Yes, it could all change. But also, God could do this through anyone. Yeah. I just decide to be obedient. Yeah. He's given. I feel like God gives us all the same types of downloads. Meaning, your download might be about starting something for artists.

[00:43:11] My download might be about starting something for podcasters. Yeah. But it's the same download. Yeah. Holy Spirit is saying, you should do. You should do. You should do. Yeah. Most of us don't listen. Mm-hmm. Most of us stay distracted. Most of us stay discouraged. Most of us give ourselves a reason to not do the thing God is calling us to do. Most Christians give themselves a easier out that seems spiritual. Yeah.

[00:43:40] So, God is telling you to build a business. Mm-hmm. And you'll say, oh, I saw the Bible group. Okay. That's good too. Yeah. That's good too. Yeah. It's great to have seven people in your apartment. Yeah. He told you to build seven figures. Yeah. But that's on you. Yeah. And it's not to say that you can't do both, but what did he tell you to do? Mm-hmm. Right?

[00:44:06] And so we kid ourselves and we tell ourselves these things are pious or religious or better. And then we don't go after. Yeah. Our dreams. We don't go after the things God put on our heart. And I've had to challenge myself with that. Yeah. And I tell myself, well, you could be disobedient if you want. He's just going to use somebody else. And you're going to sit there and watch. Mm. That's a great practical. I'm telling you. Of telling yourself that. Yeah. Because you also have to ask yourself, when you see people doing things and you feel a little jealous or a little insecure, ask yourself why. Mm-hmm. There's a reason. It's not just, oh, you're in sin and you're jealous. Yeah.

[00:44:36] You're a spirit man. The spirit inside of you is called to that in some way, shape, or form. You might be called to serve in that capacity. You might be called to perform in that capacity. Yeah. But there's a reason you're in disobedience to God. He's telling you to do something. Yeah. And so for me, the reason I know this is because I've been disobedient. Yeah. Come on. I've been in seasons where God is like, hey, the Holy Spirit is prompting me to do something big and small.

[00:45:06] This is not all just about art to perform it. Yeah. It could be something small. Yes. To talk to somebody. To forgive somebody. Ooh. To go to therapy. Yeah. To go on a diet. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. All the things. You know? And when you're living in disobedience and you start to get them consequences. Yeah. You start to say, okay, no more. So I'm in a season right now. One of our homegirls has been on my head about content and sharing my life with people. Shout out to Tiara.

[00:45:36] You guys have seen her episode already. But I'm like, you know what, God? Because she's not the first person that was on me. But there was another brother who was on my head at one point like, yo, you need to be talking on the internet. You need to be talking on the internet. And I would not do it. Oh. And that brother went on to do amazing. Millions of followers on TikTok, Instagram, all the things. You shared this on the podcast. Yes. So now I said, I'm going to listen now, Lord. Yeah. I'm not going. Yeah. So it is real. Remembering that he's going to do it. Regardless.

[00:46:05] And usually he's going to use somebody that's less talented than you. See that? Yeah. Amen. Yep. He will use somebody. Yeah. Because the foolish things. He will use the foolish things to shame the wise. He always does. He will use somebody that is less gifted than you. But obedient. Yeah. To surpass you. Kevin on stage said this to me one time. He's like somebody who was more. There are people who are way funnier than me. I just show up every day. Wow. I just do the work every single day. Day in and day out. Come on.

[00:46:33] And so I really believe that for the young, for the entrepreneur, for the young Christian, you know, staying obedient to God in this season of what you're doing is so important. If he tells you to stop, then stop. Yeah. If he tells you go full time in ministry and don't ever sing another song and be quiet, and be humble and be, you know, I don't think that's from God, but some people, you know, and tells you quit all your hobbies and don't have any other hobby, don't do anything else but ministry. Then you can always do that. It's not going anywhere.

[00:47:03] But if you're in a season of your life where he has given you some dominion, he's given you some connections, he's given you some power and a space, you better take it. Because I promise you there's somebody who's trying to sing, trying to start a business, and they're not having the success you're having. There are people who helped me start this podcast that I have surpassed. Wow. Wow. It's favor. It's not. Yeah. It ain't me. Yeah. I'm not more talented than these people. You know what I mean?

[00:47:31] Just God just said, I'm elevating you now. How crazy would I be not to take full advantage of every opportunity? So I'm excited for you. So when you do a few more friends, these are live in-person events. You have venues. You have artists come out. And I think people are really desirous of in-person connection these days, coming out of the pandemic, coming out of everything being virtual and being online.

[00:47:59] Are you finding that people show up with a different level of excitement and anticipation? Yes. I feel like people are desperate for real connection. People will pay for friendship, which is weird. But especially in Los Angeles, I think everyone is so busy grinding and being in their own lane, hustle culture, all of that, that underneath all that, people feel really lonely. And they want somebody by their side, not even to achieve the dream, just to get coffee, just to check in with them.

[00:48:28] And so it's cool because I don't really feel intimidated by the whole AI thing. I mean, it's frustrating. These AI songs that are coming out, it's like, okay, making money and all that. But there's something about raw music. There's something about live music, live performances. It's just a different – the frequency literally hits your body different. And people come and they – we have a live house band. So it's saxophones, guitar, bass, all that.

[00:48:58] You have the singers. You got soul. You got R&B, some pop. And there's just – I think like God obviously created music to be used and performed live. Like the harp, the lyre, all this stuff. It's live music. But I love what it does to people when you sit. Sometimes I'll sit in the back and I'll just watch people. And they're just like popping their heads. And they're just like, hey! And they're screaming. And you're automatically connecting. Music is extremely powerful.

[00:49:26] And so I love just watching it connect people. It's the easiest thing to talk about. Like, oh, what music do you do? What genre do you do? But then like it's just an easy segue for connection. That's really what it is. And I love asking people, okay, like are you a songwriter? Are you a rapper? But the cool thing about the show that we do, we have a show called On The Spot. And so we write music live on the spot with the audience's participation. And I lead that portion. It's really fun. I'm a little stressed out about it sometimes. But it's okay.

[00:49:55] Like I'm recruiting other people to do it. But basically it's all about connecting with the audience. Because sometimes people just get up on the stage, they perform, and then they leave. Especially big time people. And I get it. They're tired. They're touring. Whatever. But I really value that individual connection. And so if we're going to build you a fan base, you want to actually be friends with the people who are trying to support you. So we'll write the song. And I'll have the band be like, okay. So I'll ask like, give me like a time of day. Give me an emotion.

[00:50:21] And the band just starts to play melodies that give you like happy or sad or whatever. And then the audience is raising their hand and they're like interacting with us. And they feel like they're a part of writing a song. And then they hear it and they're like, oh my gosh, like I had a part in that. They come up to you after. And they're just grateful for being a part of the experience. So I think that's my favorite part. I think that will never die out. That will never get old because people always need other people. Yeah. Yeah. They always need community. And we're creating that kind of community.

[00:50:50] And it's cool because I've had Christian artists come on and perform. And I was a little nervous of like, okay, God, how is this going to work? Like, is it going to turn certain people off? Like, how do I want to go about this? Because I don't want to hide the fact that I'm a Christian or that I believe in God and love him. But the people that we've been bringing on, I've just been able to learn from them of how to carry myself. They're unapologetically themselves. They hold space for everybody, but they're mad cool. And people, like the headliner that we had was Dana Vons. And he is incredible.

[00:51:19] He has a business where he's not just a performer. He's not just a singer-songwriter, all that stuff, entertainer dancer. But he's dedicated to actually helping creative Christians maintain their identity in Christ and not be afraid to go after what they're creating. And his entire business is around that. So he was our headliner. Yeah. He's talking about that. And people were just flooding him because they just love the light that he carried.

[00:51:43] And it was so easy for him to point people to God because he's just being like Jesus. Yeah. And he's being cool. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And he's making people feel like, I care about something deeper than just making it. I care about who you become as you're making it. Yeah. And so I think when people see that, they want to stay and come back. So a lot of our audience has been recurring. And it's just really great what God is doing. That's such an incredible thing. I'm so excited for you.

[00:52:12] I think this is going to be bigger than you even know. I think you'll be able to do it in other cities. Oh, yeah. I think you're going to be able to really make a good amount of money as well because the money matters. People want to act like the money don't matter. The money matters. How can you help people if you're broke? I think disciples are meant to be wealthy. How am I supposed to help you? That's a whole other episode. But I know disciples are meant to be wealthy. Yeah. I'm one of them. Period. I don't play. You know what I mean? You can be broke if you want to. That's not my ministry. Okay? Me neither.

[00:52:41] And I think there's a place for living in a humble means. And I think there's a place for not. Yeah. So somebody got to help somebody. With that. I love that. We'll speak very briefly about this because we talked about it off camera. We did. But you are 25. Yeah. Beautiful. Thank you. Talented. Gifted. And single. Right? I am. And one of the things that you were mentioning was that this seems to be like something that everyone wants to talk about. Especially when you come home.

[00:53:13] I've been there. I've been through that. In the area of your singlehood, how are you trusting God with your future? Okay. So one of my friends was talking about this idea of the waiting season and how she doesn't like that term. Okay. I was like, why? And she was like, because it kind of makes it seem like the season that I'm in is just meant to wait for something else. And so that resonated with me. And I feel like there's a verse in Matthew.

[00:53:42] It's like the MSG version. So it's a little bit different. But it talks about not being so preoccupied with getting and focus on responding to what God has already given you. Not to say that I can't have feelings. I have desires. I have longings. So let's not. Let's nip that out the bud. Yeah. I want to be married. I want to have kids. And I'm trying to learn how to be more honest about that and acting like I don't want it does not make me stronger, does not make me cooler. It makes you a liar. You know what I'm saying? It does make you a liar. And I'm not trying to be a liar, you know? Because now I'm living in the dark and now that's a whole other separate situation.

[00:54:11] And now that's not. It was never that serious. But I think being honest with God about my desires helps me. But also, I was in a relationship a year and a half ago and I ended it. And I did this three-day fast. And I've never fasted that long in my life. No food, just water. And I was like scared. My hands were turning blue. It was great though because it was like I was starving my flesh and feeding off the spirit.

[00:54:39] And I really was able to hear God very clearly. And one of the things that he showed me was that parable about building the house on the rock and the sand. I've heard that many times but I never connected it to dating. And so this is something that God showed me himself. I was shocked. I was in my car and I was just like what is going on? Like you were talking about seasons and how like some scriptures are just going to like mean something different in a different season. But when building the house on the rock, I noticed like with bricks, they're heavy.

[00:55:08] They cost money. You have to go to the store. You have to buy it. And then you have to put the brick on the cement. And then you have to do it again and again. And the sand, it's cheap. You can go to the beach for free, pick it up and just slap it together with some mud. And I'm noticing like the foundation that I think I had with the person that I was building. It was on sin. It was very quick. You know, it was like, oh my God, I love you. You love me. You like me. Okay, let's just get together. Chemistry was being prioritized. Physique was being prioritized. And you love God, sure. That was like slapped on there.

[00:55:38] But I realized that that relationship revealed a lot about my heart. And that it's not just about coming together with another person to build something. Before that even happens, it's really important what I am personally building on with me and God. And I noticed, oh, my foundation is not on the rock right now. It's really sandy. And that's why I was just like, all right, cool. Let's just get into it. You cute, I'm cute, you know? And I think you love God and I think I love God too. And that's just not enough.

[00:56:08] I didn't have any malintention, but it revealed so much. I felt like I emotionally attached so quickly. Why? And I'm grateful for that season because it really taught me how to be a student of the word. And I think I cried a lot during that season just because my security wasn't coming from God. My identity was like not really in God. It wasn't how I looked, my confidence, my beauty. Like it was all like this outward focus.

[00:56:33] And so when that relationship ended, it just gave me this time to really reflect. But to really just see like, wow, like me and God need to spend some time together. And I need to spend time looking at him. I need to spend time building my bricks on him and building my house and really enjoying him. Like this is a beautiful, I think singleness is beautiful. I think marriage is beautiful.

[00:56:59] And I'm finally in this place where I'm like, I like being single. And I think it's a beautiful thing because me and God, like we have this undivided time to get to know one another. And I think he's great. At times I think he's annoying sometimes. And I'm like, I kind of didn't want this to go that way. And I can be honest, but my time is not being fought for or demanded of me in different directions. And I like my bed and like I'm a wild sleeper and like all that.

[00:57:28] And like, you know, I like waking up when I want to. We already talked about that. So I'm like, I'm going to enjoy and not grieve a season. I don't need to grieve, you know? And like there's a, God says that he makes everything beautiful and it's time. So I'm choosing to believe that this is beautiful. And I'm having fun. I'm building the business. I'm working hard. I'm grinding. I'm making friends with everybody. I got all my girls. I got all my homies, my guys. And like, I don't really like them like that, but they know that. And maybe some of them I have liked, but I didn't tell them that yet.

[00:57:59] And I'm cool with it because God is not telling me. And it's just, I really feel like God has my future secured. So I'm not like, I'm just waiting for you to get, I'm like, you know what? Thank you for giving me this, this time where I'm free. I'm having so much fun and I'm able to do what I want, when I want, how I want in God's I'm carefree in the care of God. Yes. That's what's happening. I love this for you. I am a big fan of single women. You know this. Yes.

[00:58:28] I think that your single season, especially in your 20s, is the best of times. Yeah. I hate, I love what your friend said. I hate when single women are like, I'm just waiting. I'm just waiting. Yeah. I'm just waiting. Girl, go on vacation. Yes. I was pursuing my dreams. I was curating shows and hosting open mics and doing poetry and music.

[00:58:57] And I lived a good, good life. And I believe that so much of what my husband finds fascinating and irresistible about me was developed in my singlehood. Wow. If you are just waiting for the husband, when he gets there, he gonna be bored. Ooh. He gonna be bored. Yeah.

[00:59:26] Do something in life so you have some stories to tell. Yes. So you have some things to say, some pictures to show. And adventures to join me on. Like, I don't plan on stopping when we get married. That part. Okay. It needs to rev up, actually. Yes. Okay. Yes. So I love that for you. And I can feel it. You know? I can feel that you are happy, that you feel fulfilled by just the amount of scriptures that are flowing off of you. I can tell that you take your time with God seriously. That he is your anchor. That he's your happy place.

[00:59:54] That's a big part of being surrendered. Yeah. And content in your singlehood. Mm-hmm. It's because you're spending time with God. There is no man. I'm married to a very spiritual man who I love, who loves Jesus. And what the, what the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the. It does not, it's not better than my time with God. Yeah. It's not better. Yeah. And even in my marriage, if I go too many days without having some real deep time with God, if I'm just drive by scripture, scripture of the day, you will. Yeah. Oh, I'm not good.

[01:00:23] It's not good. It's not good. There's nothing he can do to woo me. Yeah. I need to be wooed by the savior. Mm. You know? And that is why I have such a robust life. Mm. You know what I mean? It's not my husband. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I'm grateful for him. Yes. Very grateful. Yeah. But it's God. Yeah. And I even be telling him, I'm going to have the stuff, even if you stop giving it to me. Yeah. Because he's not going to stop giving it to me. Serious.

[01:01:17] Yeah. I don't deserve it. I know. Yeah. I'm like, I'm trying to appeal to his heartstrings. Right. You know? And I ask that about big things. Mm. You know, my husband's health, both his parents passed away from cancer. I said, God, I rebuke any cancerous cell, any, any, you know, hereditary anything. Yeah. I said, but just because I'm your baby girl, don't take my husband that way. Please. Wow. And I believe that he will be just fine. Yes. I don't care what runs in his family.

[01:01:47] I love that. I don't care. Wow. Because his baby girl has asked him, please. Yes. I ask that for my own life. Yeah. Lord, don't take me from him. He's already lost two parents. Don't let him lose a wife. God, God. For your baby girl. Mm. I love that. You know? Because I believe he can. Because my own dad. Mm. You know, who didn't, who wasn't in the home with me. Mm-hmm. But just as a father, he loves me. Yeah. And there's nothing I could ask my dad to do that he could do. That he wouldn't try to do. Exactly. And that's my earthly, flawed.

[01:02:17] Daddy. Very much flawed. Mm-hmm. Dad. Love you, dad. You know, dad. Oh, real. Yeah. So how much more God? And I feel like I want, I want this for married women too, but I specifically want it for single women who are struggling to wait, to understand that their dad, he's got it. Yes. Yes. He loves you too much to let you get with a buster. Hey. He can't take care of you. Come on. He loves you too much. Yeah. I don't care how long you have to wait. It's worth the wait.

[01:02:47] It is worth the wait. So I'm so, I'm proud of you. Thank you. And I'm really, really happy. And I'm happy that you're not letting people's questions or pressure make you feel a way. Yes, it could be annoying. Yeah. But don't. Yeah. Don't let it in. Yeah. Let it, you know, let it come in this ear and go out that way. Truly. You know? Yeah. You are, you're doing great. You're doing great. Thank you. And I'm inspired by you too. Thank you. Yeah. Thank you. I really love it. Listen, us chocolate girls gotta stick together. Come on. We beat each other. I have a question that I asked to end off our show. Okay.

[01:03:17] And the question is, in the grand scheme of things, what do you want your legacy to be? Dang, that's deep. I know. You're so young too, but still. Yeah. Because, I mean, it's a good question. Because if I wasn't here tomorrow, I do think about that. Like, with a few more friends, I've thought about it often. If I wasn't the one running it, being entrusted to run it, what would I want people to be left with?

[01:03:43] And the whole theme is like, one of the things that defines us as a friend of God is how we love other people. And so I just want people to be sincerely loved by me. And that they knew that I cared deeply about them, who they are, and what they wanted in life, but also where they were going. And I desire for people to have this access to God.

[01:04:12] But I really want people to be authentic. I want them to be real, be themselves, follow their dreams. But that they are loved enough to do that. You know? That they, that I think love is the, it's that secret sauce. You know? It's that superpower that can change the world, that has changed the world. So that's, I think, what I would want to be. I would want to leave people with that. That's good.

[01:04:41] Well, you're well on your way. You're well on your way. So just keep swimming. So you got a single that's coming out. Yes. Tell us, it's called Nobody. Yeah, I have two. You have two singles coming out. What's the second one? Just Need Sun. Just Need Sun. So we got Nobody and Just Need Sun. Tell us a little bit. You told us about what Nobody was inspired by. Tell us about Just Need Sun, when it's coming out, and where we can find it. Yes. Just Need Sun. It's a play on like, I moved to California. I'm a Jersey girl. Don't get it twisted. I'm a Jersey girl.

[01:05:10] But I moved to LA, the sunny state. I love it out there. And I've been in the sun a lot. And sometimes you really just need some sun. You need to go outside. But it's also like a double entendre, okay, of needing Jesus. I need Jesus. And it says, when the sun touches my face, I feel holy. And so you can interpret that how you may. But my intention for that is that when God touches my face, my space, my life, not only do I feel holy, but I become it.

[01:05:39] You know, I become holy. That's the goal, to be set apart for him and all that. But that's Just Need Sun and Nobody. They're coming out separate times. It's out now. Yeah. I don't remember the day. Yeah. So thanks for watching another episode of I'll Just Let Myself In. I hope that this conversation inspired you maybe to start something new, maybe to start something in service to other people in your industry. I hope that this conversation inspired you, particularly if you're single, to live your best life now and not to wait.

[01:06:09] If you've listened to Holy Culture, Sirius XM channel 140 at 8 p.m. Eastern Standard Time on a Monday night. We thank you for listening there. If you watch on their YouTube, we thank you for watching there. And if you're watching on my YouTube, we thank you for watching here. Please make sure that you are subscribed and that you've hit that notification bell so that you don't miss any of my upcoming content. And we'll see you back here next week. Same time. Same place. Peace.