CHM 150: Breaking Free From Hustle Culture & Self-Care for Homeschool Moms

Hi, and welcome to the Christian homeschool Mom's podcast. On this show, the goal is to encourage the Christian mom to homeschool with joy during this very limited season of your life, and is stay hopeful on this homeschool journey, and I pray that you will find these practical homeschool tips very helpful for you in your everyday life as a mom of faith. And I'm Dimitria, your host. I'm a veteran homeschool mom of two wonderful daughters, one in college and one in high school. I'm a wife, a songwriter, podcaster, and child of the King, and I'm very happy to be your host. So my last episode was several months ago where I shared information about homeschooling middle school, and it's been quite a ride since then. So some of you know that I've had this lengthy break because of a change in my career path over the past couple of months and I ended up hopping on a teaching opportunity which had been super time consuming working at my daughter's school because she went off to school for the very first time. And I may share about that in an upcoming episode, I'm not sure, but on this show, I just wanted to be sure and share one last interview for twenty twenty three before we start a new series in twenty twenty four. So my last interview for this year will be with Megan Davido, and I'm going to introduce her in a moment, and I just wanted to kind of like give you a little bit more in the background of what happened these past couple of months is that I have learned so much about myself in working at her school, as my daughter and I both have kind of changed gears for this year and she's in school now, not online school anymore, but actually at school. I'd love to share more about that in a future episode because I think you might be interested in why we chose this and how she has responded to going from homeschool to the classroom, and so I think that my be of interest to you. She's really enjoying herself right now, and so we'll talk more about it another time. But needless to say, my life has definitely changed in more ways than one. So my last couple of episodes that I'm doing for her business elevated podcast, but she can also find on Apple Podcasts, is about self care and it's because this has been my season of really zeroing in on what it is I need to take care of me, because I realized how very fragile life can be and how it's so important to take care of ourselves before we get an initial diagnosis on something. You know. That's why I talk about self care so much, because I know it's so important and our health is not something to play around with and it's not guaranteed, right like life is not guaranteed us every day and when we wake up each morning, it's a blessing. Have breath in our lungs, it's a blessing. And so to have your health. It means so much to be able to open your mouth and talk and to be able to hear a sound come out of your mouth. Every little thing that works in our body is a blessing. And I am so grateful to be able to live and to enjoy life. And so that said, I just want to give you more encouragement in the area of self care and might do, like I said, one more episode. I may or may not well see it's my last interview for the year, but not necessarily in my last podcast episode. I may do one more, but this is what Meghan and I think that what Megan offers to us is helpful for homeschool moms because we need to be able to take care of ourselves on so many different levels. And so that's why I keep bringing that to this show this year. There's a lot of push and a lot of intentionality in these episodes topics because I want us to focus on taking care of ourselves. So Megan has a passion to help clients build boundaries and starving distractions in all areas. She has over twenty years of leadership experience in developing people to live their life to the fullest potential. The essence of Megan's work is to facilitate self growth by helping clients identify boundaries and the core challenges in their life so that they can overcome them with confidence. Meghan holds certifications as a Christian life coach. She has coached in a variety of industries including direct cells, consultant for small businesses, and she's been a leader in Fortune five hundred companies. So I'm going to get straight into this interview with Meghan, and I pray that you are blessed by the rest of this episode. Hi everybody, and welcome to the Christian Homeschool Mom's Podcast. I have a special guest today and her name is Megan DeVito. She is a Christian life coach and she's helped clients identify their boundaries and the core challenges in their life so that they can overcome them with confidence. She has also been a leader in Fortune five hundred companies and she has a lot to share with us as moms of faith. And so I want to welcome Megan. Thank you so much for being here today. Thank you. It's such an honor and privilege. So thank you for this opportunity. You're so welcome, and you have a lot to share with us today. But we're going to get started with our basics, just kind of getting to know you, so always do I get to know you segment when we first get started, So if you can just share who you are, maybe a little bit about where you live, your family, some things that you enjoy doing that make your life happy. Absolutely. Obviously, my name is Megan. I'm married to my best friend and Peter, and we have a fifteen year old daughter and a sixteen year old son. And then one thing that I mean love to do most that you'll always find me either in the kitchen cooking or sitting with a raid done mug, having coffee and sharing the Word with my family. There's nothing better than being able to do that. So yeah, I'm just I'm really simple and just love family time. I love that, Yes, same, I love having my I have my favorite mug. Also that I just sit back and once my family sees that mug, they're like, Okay, Mom's out for the day, she's done relaxing. So okay. You became a Christian life coach is how I introduced you, and so I would love to know your journey to this place of life coaching. Yeah, it is absolutely a journey. And I you know, God has just been so good to me. He's our heavenly Father has just been so patient and corrected me along the way. I didn't come. I didn't become a life coach because I just had this in pimphany one day that I needed to be a life coach. I came from a burned out environment of the hustle culture and I needed rest in my life. And I didn't know what I needed until it was pointed out not only by the Lord, but another coach who I was working with at the time. So I started this journey as a life coach. You know, I've been going on almost seven years coaching. But you know, the Lord has given me incredible experiences in my life, and he boldly told me when I got still enough to hear him and start those distractions that were going in my life that I've experienced, that I'm not using that he gave me. So here I am today using what God has given to you. So I love that. Okay. So in your coaching, you have four specific areas that you specialize in, so I want to know what these areas are. We all want to hear, like how you actually help women in our journey in life and what are those four areas? Yeah, you know the areas of life you usually you know, it's it's family, it's about the spiritual journey, it's about the wellness journey, right, It's about home life and business life. But the main thing that I am called to do is help women build boundaries and start distractions in their home life and business so they could step into His true piece. You know, we have so many distractions robbing us of our joy, pulling at us, and we think that we're doing everything that we're called to do. But once we shed all that and we're silent and still enough to hear what He wants for us, that's when we really feel a fulfilled. Yes, absolutely, just having that that personal connection with God to I think is I mean, that's the start. And so many of us are busy, and you mentioned culture, so we're going to talk about that and just but boundaries. Let's get into boundaries real quick, because as women and as moms, moms of faith, homeschooling moms, how important in your opinion are these boundaries that we need to be in place in our lives as women, especially women who are in the throes of parenting. We've got all ring all the hats and we're doing all the things. How do we implement boundaries in our lives? To answer your questions, the first question was how important is it to have boundaries in our life? Boundaries are our life saver? I mean you can I don't recommend going through life without them because I did for so long, so right, So boundaries are life saver? And how to implement them in our life? You know, I look to the Lord like the Lord is so clear on his boundaries. And this is something I had to learn the hard way because we're not born with boundaries. All of us are moms. And if you could think of, you know, your toddler going to the hot stove and touching it or running down the you know the mall, you know the hall in the mall, because they don't have boundaries, they're testing, they're pushing boundaries, right, So it's our job as parents to instill boundaries in their life life. What's good for them, what's not good for them, what's going to hurt them, and show them right. But when you come up in it, I came up in a very dysfunctional I'm not a victim of but I came up in a very dysfunctional family where there was no boundaries. So I didn't start learning to build boundaries probably until I was at the age of twenty five. And then once I started building the boundaries that I was able to build, the Lord started blessing me. And you know what I said about I looked to the Lord, like, you know, he is clear on he is love, he's not darkness. He's clear who he allows into his house, who he does not right and instilling so building boundaries. As a mom and as a wife. You know, we are always the last person that we put ourselves, put ourselves in, you know, like we're considered of ourselves. We're always the last one. And I heard it loud and clear from the Lord and you know, the people pleasing the endless. I'm putting everyone first. I was so far demetor out of God's family alignment for what he wanted for me and my life was a messy agenda game that was just all over the table. Wow. Well, and so many of us have experienced that or may even currently be experiencing the lack of boundaries and what that results in, the chaos that it results in in our lives. And sometimes we because we're moms and because we have a heart for our kids and for our families, a lot of times we put ourselves on the back burner, and we sometimes even grow into developing this mindset up. Do I really deserve to see myself as important enough to put myself first? Is it okay to put myself first when I have responsibilities? Right? And so we just get so accustomed to putting ourselves on the back. And so one of the things that I like to bring forward on this podcast is self care. I know it's such a broad term, everybody's throwing that term around nowadays, but it is like so so so so important that as women, that God created us so that we would take care of ourselves and take care of others as well. But it starts here, got to take care of me, you know, and we have to take care of ourselves first. And meanwhile, you know, you have a story of how you were you got caught up in the whole hustle culture, and I think that's something we definitely need to hear because as busy moms, you know, we're chowfing our kids everywhere, or you know, some of us may be working full time part time while taking care of our kids. There is a hustle to that and it can be very demeaning, and it can be very it can be hard, It can be difficult to keep all the plates in the air. How did you do it and what did you learn from that experience and how did you break free from it? Thank you? So I'm going to share something with your listeners, and it kind of it's not going to answer the question right away, but we'll get to that, okay. So I became actively addicted to alcohol at the age of fifteen. So fifteen and twenty five I grew. When I was growing up, I was really into the throes of alcoholism. So at twenty five I went into rehab and I got the help that I needed, and I got the tools that I needed, and I also got supported myself around the community I needed. Right. So then twenty five, and you know, I got sober. I met my husband. God blessed us with kids, and then I started doing I got involved in a direct sales company. And I love women that are able to be entrepreneurs and make money for themselves. There's nothing wrong with direct sales. I'm not saying it's bad, right, But for me, I got so caught up in the hustle of the recognition, the validation, the paychecks, the commas, the zeros on the paychecks weren't getting longer each month, the being available for everybody at an urgent speed, where my phone became, you know, the third person in the bedroom with my husband, you know. So I So what happened was met I hit a rock bottom so hard it was like I was going back into rehabit when I was twenty five. Wow, that's how rock bottom. I hit so hard and I looked up and I just was like, my life, what did I do? And I and I didn't see it. The blinders were on. The money was good, the vacations were great. Right, I'm home providing for my family, right. But at the end of the day, my husband resented me. I didn't know my kids were missing me. I didn't know, but I was here and I was running on urgency and anxiety all the time. Yeah, yeah, And those are things we just don't know when we're in the throes of trying to balance it all and trying to have it all all at once. And it's what you said, that sense of urgency, and we get caught up in that rat race, as they say, that cycle of it's almost like an addiction of I've got to have X in order to have why. But in order to have why, I've got to have all the things before X, and then we'll get to Z. But it's just like this constant rat race. And that is what hustle culture is, whether it's in the form of work or ministry or service and volunteering, whatever we're doing that's causing that sense of hustle in our lives where we can't take the time to breathe and enjoy the gifts we've been given in family and just life in general. So thank you for sharing that story is really helpful and how can we break free from it? Afterward? I would love for you to share like your products, your coaching services, and what you do to help women break free from this huscle culture. Thank you? You know I think how do we break free? For me? I needed an outside accountability. I needed someone looking into my life and saying, you know what your heart is right, but everything you're doing is wrong, right, Like, well, you have really good intentions, but it's just messy right. Because I couldn't hear my husband tell me that right, because the way that he was commuting communicating, I thought I wasn't doing enough when I was doing too much right, so we were missing each other. The communication piece was there, so I needed I hired a co my first coach I had when I was in business, and they they called me out, Megan, are you taking a sabbath? And I said no, why aren't you taking a sabbath? Right? And I was like, I was convicted that if I want to kill somebody or cheating my husband. Why am I not taking a day arrest? Why am I getting in the car Sunday after service where we haven't even left the parking lot yet, and I'm on my phone answering people like shame on me? Right? So I started implementing and with all my clients. I mean, I had to get dimitor, I had a detox, I had to get sweaty, I had to be uncomfortable. I had to do all the things because but I was so desperate for change, and I a sabbath changed and saved my family dynamic. We started incorporating it. Anyone that wants to know what that looks like, I just suggest start doing it, and then your spouse will come along and your kids will come along. But I couldn't tell my husband I wasn't going to work today because his reaction and his response was always I'll see it till I believe it. Right, So I started implementing a sabbath. I started turning off my phone. And then God has been so good to us because he has given us a day, or he has given us a sabbath, or asked for about a year and a half ago, asked us to take over the Saturday greeting team on Saturday service, and I was like, don't you know I love Sunday worship, Like don't you? And he put us in the Saturday service and we go to Saturday service and we go there, we start our Sabbath. We unplugged Sunday's for family and God just knew what we needed. So how do we break free? I think it's really just getting back to family. God's family order biblically right, he honors that. That's it. That's it, That's what it is. It's I mean, the simple things that He implemented and told the Israelites to do. It's like, okay, let's look back on at the beginning, the beginning of time. See what did you tell them to do? Because that is the basic structure of how he wanted things to run in the universe, and there's an order to it, and there's a reason that He's set to keep the Sabbath holy and to rest. He rested on the seventh day, So why aren't we doing that? You know? And I was like, you know, I heard him say, do you think you're so important that you have to be available all the time? I was like, ouch, ouch, I know that. Yeah, it's like the pride that we don't even know we have. It's like, wow, that hurts, but it makes us take that second look like, yeah, okay, that's an area in my life that I need to give up to God. Like we need to have boundaries, and that's one of the boundaries is knowing what belongs to us and what belongs to God and giving to him what's his. And I just love this that we're through your help in this interview, we're able to kind of bring to the light the things that women of God that God's people need to begin to implement so we can even enjoy our lives better. It's not just for because He wants the glory and he wants us to serve him, but it's also for our benefit. And sometimes when we keep doing the things we're doing and we're doing everything the wrong way and fast, you know, we don't get where where we need to be. And God is just like, if you just follow my simple commandments, you can have all the beauty and the health and the wealth and the everything you're looking for. It's right here in the simplicity of my word. So you know, it's unbelievable. Because God, you know, I know that my walk is not for me. It's for my children and their children. It's their foundation, and I give it up to the Lord and whatever you want to do with me for me, for them, right and the way that my our kids have peace like they there's this sense of peace. And I started incorporating a Sabbath into our everyday weekly rhythm. And then little did I know that I was going to move into the homeschool school in realm, right, Like, I couldn't be crazy, chaotic, savage mode here and then show up for my kids in the homeschooling. I just couldn't. The Lord knew I couldn't write so but yeah, it's for it's for the it's for that my children and they know what a day arrest is and they know how to implement it. Yeah. Yeah, there's a season and a time for all things. And sometimes the Lord has to quiet us down a little bit and say, Okay, this is the season for rest or for the focus on the kids, or the season there's a season for you know, maybe we've got to work a little hard for a while and then we need to take a break. And that in itself can be a Sabbath season. So many different ways to look at how God wants us to live, but there's an order to it, and I just thank you for bringing that to the surface. And I want to know what you offer to our listeners today in terms of your products, your programs, any services you have that can help us to tap into finding the Sabbath in our lives and breaking free from hustle culture and finding boundaries. Thank you. I'm just gonna say, you just said a sabbath, a season of Sabbath, and I just got so much peace in my heart. I'm like, oh my gosh, I do need a season of Sabbath Like you said that. It was just like hit me. It was like so beautiful. So thank you for the opportunity to share that. So my website is Megan It's my first name with an h megandivito dot com. I'm offering free coaching calls to anyone who's listening to this. You could get on a coaching call with me. I'll look at everything from a bird's eye view, help you get aligned with what is it that God's calling you and your family to do at that time. And then also to the first week of June I'm coming out. I have a course that's coming out how to say no to others and know with a K you're worth in Christ and how we stop people pleasing because of what he tells us to do. So I got some things working I would be happy to share on my website. That is. That's all we need that people saying how to say no, like oh yeah, perfect. So that's coming out in June, and then they can go to Megan or we can go to megandivito dot com. So yes, spell that out for us. Yep, it's Meg hn di vito d e v I t O all one word dot com. There is a Megan I sell without an hdivito dot com. I just realized, So make sure you have the H in it to connect with me perfect And we'll get this all on the show notes for our listeners today. But Megan, I just want to thank you again for being with us today. It has been a pleasure. It's been encouraging and aspiring, So thank you so much for your time. Thank you. I hope that you enjoyed today's episode. Just to recap, Meghan and I talked about some important boundaries in our lives as women and how we can keep boundaries while in the throes of parenting. We talked about how she broke free from hustle culture and implemented a sabbath that changed your life in some ways, we as busy moms, can do the same, and then she shared with us some of her coaching services and products. So I hope that you'll reach Megan and you can find her at megandivito dot com. And that is how she spelled it in the episode earlier. So that's m E G h A N D E v I t O dot com. So that's all I have for you on today's episode. I hope you enjoyed it and keep in touch with me as well. You can find me on Instagram at Christian homeschool Moms and until next time, Happy homeschooling.