Group Therapy

[00:00:00] Greetings and welcome to Become A Competent Biblical Counselor. This is Dr. Dave Jones,

[00:00:24] and today's subject is entitled, Group Therapy. Here's a letter about a very important

[00:00:30] subject. It says, My friend has been going to a group therapy session once each week. She

[00:00:37] says that this is great. Everyone has the opportunity to say what he wants and to ventilate

[00:00:43] his feelings no matter what they are. She claims that she is losing all of her hang-ups,

[00:00:49] becoming a liberated woman. She thinks that I profit from going to. What do you think? Well,

[00:00:56] that's an interesting question, but of course I don't care really to answer the question

[00:01:01] about what I think. It doesn't really matter very much what I think unless what I think

[00:01:06] is what God thinks. So let's try to discuss this question from the viewpoint of what God's

[00:01:13] word has to say about such matters. Group therapy sessions or group sessions of various

[00:01:19] sorts or encounter groups or all sorts of groups, you never can tell what that group was

[00:01:25] going to be like from the name that it bears. Even the groups bearing the same name and

[00:01:30] even with the same leaders some time to time, very so greatly that it's hard to predict

[00:01:36] what might go on. But these sorts of activities and groups with sensitivity training or whatever

[00:01:43] involved in them have become more and more a part of a working operation of many, even

[00:01:49] Bible-believing church and church organizations. And yet when this happens when such groups

[00:01:56] are brought uncritically into the church with their methods and with their viewpoints we

[00:02:02] are bound to suffer from the consequences of bringing in unbelieving philosophies into

[00:02:08] viewpoints and methodologies which are inconsistent with our Christian principles as they relate

[00:02:15] in the word of God. Now let me make one thing clear as I say these words and as I continue

[00:02:21] today, certainly the Bible is not opposed to groups as such. The family is a group, God

[00:02:29] ordained the family. The church is a group, God gathered together the people out of every

[00:02:35] tongue and tribe and kindred in nation in order to form them into that group that he calls

[00:02:42] the church. Groups in it of themselves are not wrong. In our churches we have small groups

[00:02:50] and we encourage them to develop. But the question is who is in the group? What is

[00:02:57] the purpose of the group? What are its methods? And that's sort of thing, it's not that we

[00:03:04] are against groups. Being against groups is like being against motherhood, apple pie

[00:03:09] and sunsets but it's a matter of what the group is doing and why it's doing it, what its

[00:03:16] intentions and its methods are. Now let's examine the letter a bit. In this letter that I

[00:03:23] received, there's a one day each week therapy session supposedly. Well the word therapy

[00:03:30] of course gives an indication to begin with that somebody thinks that some kind of ventilation

[00:03:37] has to do with solving medical problems. There to begin with is a nonbiblical viewpoint.

[00:03:46] But let's go past that quickly. This woman thinks it's great because she has an opportunity

[00:03:52] to say whatever she wants and to ventilate her feelings. And in this way by letting it

[00:03:58] all hang out, she thinks she's becoming liberated and losing her hang-ups. Well, that sounds

[00:04:06] rather suspicious to me. And if the group to which she is going approximates what many

[00:04:12] groups do that are described in similar terms, then what is going on in that group seems

[00:04:17] to be very unscrupcial kind of thing. Often in such groups they take this form. Everybody

[00:04:25] sits around the table and they say, now we're going to be completely open. We're going

[00:04:31] to tell everybody exactly what we think about everybody else. And so they begin systematically

[00:04:38] unlacing one another, taking out all the seams and then pulling out all the stuffing

[00:04:43] and throwing it all around the room. This of course has no value as Christians. Indeed,

[00:04:50] it is entirely opposed to what the Word of God has to say. We don't systematically cut

[00:04:58] out the people dice and cube them and throw their stuffing around the room. There's nothing

[00:05:03] Christian about that. As a matter of fact, before we are even allowed to talk to another

[00:05:09] person about himself or what is wrong with him or what we do not like in him, we are

[00:05:14] told to take the log out of our own eye before we start looking for the speck. And somebody

[00:05:20] else's eye. Not only that, this stress on ventilation of feelings is the most significant

[00:05:27] factor that has been mentioned. Feelings are stressed so dramatically in our society today

[00:05:34] as we live in a feeling oriented society. Instead of people being motivated and oriented

[00:05:40] by and toward the Word of God, that is obediently seeking to do what God tells them in the

[00:05:45] Scriptures, people instead do what they feel like doing and they're encouraged to do so

[00:05:51] on every hand. We live in such a feeling oriented society that people won't even say

[00:05:58] any more. What do you think about so-and-so? They're not allowed to have an opinion. They

[00:06:04] say, what do you feel about such and such a subject? When my friends say that to me, I usually

[00:06:10] say just in order to remind them of course. I usually say to them something like this,

[00:06:17] can't I have an opinion? May I only emote or if they say, how do you feel about such

[00:06:23] and such a subject? I may say great or lousy to let them know that we're talking about an

[00:06:31] opinion, we're talking about an idea. We're talking about a thought, we're talking about

[00:06:37] a reason not only about feelings. Life is not just feeling. Feeling has its place, but

[00:06:43] it's far more than feeling. Now this concept of ventilation is a very unbiblical one. For

[00:06:52] instance, the Scriptures tell us all through the book of Proverbs for instance that the

[00:06:57] fool is the man who gives full vent to his spirit of anger. And in a group session for example,

[00:07:03] that you might read about here or there someone may be handed a pillow. Let's say the woman

[00:07:08] is handed a pillow and she's told now this is your mother. Now you have some feelings of

[00:07:14] anger toward your mother. Okay, punch your mother and she does half heartedly. No, no,

[00:07:22] no, says the group really get in there, punch, punch harder and she's egged on and encouraged

[00:07:29] on until finally the fists are flying in the events or the pillar, ribs apart and the

[00:07:35] feathers go flying all around the room. And that person has been encouraged in that group

[00:07:41] therapy in quote session to murder her mother in effigy. The Scriptures say that even

[00:07:47] hatred in the heart is murder in the heart. How much more even so this kind of encouragement

[00:07:53] by a group therapy session? No, you see the answer is not to mimic and imitate the ways

[00:08:00] of the world, not to turn to such things as this but the answer is to turn to the Scriptures

[00:08:06] and define what God says to do about such problems as hatred or anger toward one's mother.

[00:08:13] If she is angry it doesn't do any good to punch the pillow. It only makes her all the more

[00:08:18] angry into feel, all the more guilty for having done it afterwards. If she's angry she

[00:08:25] should talk to God first about this matter. Secondly she should go and talk to her mother

[00:08:32] and get the problem straightened right away. If you don't straighten out problems with

[00:08:38] another person by seeing his face on the golf ball or giving it a good squat, you don't

[00:08:43] straighten out problems with people by putting a face over the dartboard and throwing

[00:08:47] darts through the nose. You straighten out problems with people by doing the biblically

[00:08:52] courageous thing of going to them and talking to them and straightening out the matters

[00:08:58] with them, dealing with the issues in their problems and resolving them that way. So my

[00:09:05] friend, you who write, let me encourage you to say away from all such activities. Go to

[00:09:12] the group of people, the people who are involved in the problem, your mother, your father,

[00:09:17] your sister, your husband, your brother. The church member, whoever it is, you have a problem

[00:09:22] with and with whom you can find reconciliation and with whom you can get down on your knees in

[00:09:28] that group. That's the real group with which to deal with the problem. And one thing I want

[00:09:34] to bring attention to, in this subject of reconciliation, remember that reconciliation always precedes

[00:09:42] worship. For example, in Matthew 5, 23 to 24, it says, therefore if you are presenting your

[00:09:50] offering at the altar and they remember that your brother has something against you, leave

[00:09:55] your offering there before the altar and go. First, be reconciled to your brother and then come

[00:10:02] and present your offering. So be reconciled first so that your prayers are not hindered.

[00:10:09] I hope this gives some clarity if there is any confusion with respect to group therapy.

[00:10:13] It's valuable provided that it's therapy that God has sanctioned. Have a great day and I'll talk to you later.